Breaking down to Rise Up ~ The Dark Side of Transformation | Audio + Article

Have you ever felt like there was a dark cloud surrounding you or suffocating you?

Have you ever thought that your life was falling apart or that you were really losing your ground?

Have you experienced such deep pain or fear that you thought you might lose it — your mind, your sanity, your peace?

Have you ever felt that despite all of your wisdom and personal development work you just might have to retreat in defeat???

Having recently passed through a dark patch in my life I can safely say that I have a pretty good system of going within to find peace and solace. My go-to solutions include the Attunement Meditation, QiGong, prayer and journaling. These quiet practices help me reconnect to my Source of healing and wisdom. And these practices typically provide me with insight. I gain wisdom about the darkness around me — but not this time.

In fact, I was recently struck by the odd coincidence that a few people in my spiritual tribe, the so-called Light workers of my world, had also been through some weirdly dark circumstances recently. So dark that they brought everything within their hearts and minds into doubt, fear and gloom.

I recorded my response in this week’s podcast episode, which I invite you to download and reflect deeply on the questions I pose.

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Swirling in darkness, I thought it was only me. But hearing from friends in different countries and at different stages of life, I wondered if it was a weird planetary influence, or some black magic spell.

We each bore witness to some of the most scary aspects of humanity being brought to Light.

The one thing that is now clear, looking back, is that the darkness came unexpectedly, like a sneak attack. We weren’t anticipating these challenges, we were busy doing our thing — sharing Light and love with the world.

These experiences made some of us question ourselves in every way.

It also felt like we were being tested somehow.

While I felt like I was cracking & breaking down, I was opening for more Light to flow

I would never have imagined that this dark passage was actually a step forward in an upward evolution. It felt more like a breakdown. Thankfully, hindsight is 20/20. I can see now that this has been an up-leveling of sorts.

In response to some internet trolls trying to steal her positive vibe, one of the #RealSelfLove Leaders, Taz Thornton, shifted her perspective when she expressed it this way:

It’s like playing a computer game. You know you’re about to level up when the ‘boss’ comes out for you to defeat, right?
That’s all trolls are. They’re like the boss level in a computer game. They’re just an indication that you’re leveling up.

So I wondered, is it a coincidence that lately many of us have been feeling the blows of negativity in a variety of forms — from the basic business challenges to the deeply spiritual attacks against us?

How could it be that these spiritually-grounded friends were hit around the same time?

Is it possible that many of us are being called to recognize that this is part of our progression as Light workers?

Could these experiences actually be part of our progression to a new level of play?

I love how Taz put it because for years I’ve explained to my clients that we could really look at life as a video game. Being a child of the Atari 2600 generation I know that playing each game involves certain rules, various field constraints, a host of tools or weapons.

As the player of the game of life, I am not attached to the avatar or game piece. I am the consciousness, the awareness, or the Soul that animates the player. So I need not take any of the hits or strikes personally.

It’s not personal.

Unless I totally identify with the flesh and blood of my character.

But you, my friend, are not a body. You are more than your flesh and blood. Indeed, you are the soul hopping a ride through life on Earth in a physical body.

You are the conscious spirit which animates your body — you are more than flesh & bone!

So, could it be that the dark periods you’ve endured in the past (or present) were or are meant as part of your initiation or graduation to a whole new level of existence?

In this short podcast episode, I offer my own insight and advice to you with one simple exercise. I invite you to sit with this question as you bring to mind your pain, the darkness, the seemingly unfair attacks,

“Is it possible that this experience is part of your transformation to a higher level in life?”
Is it possible that your painful experience is part of your evolution to bring more Light & Love to you and through you?

Ask yourself,

“Am I going through an initiation? Is this part of my up-leveling?”

I personally found this self-inquiry to be an eye opening experience. It allowed me to open my mind, too. Rather than going into a full-on freak out or pity party, I was able to gather my wits to bring my best self to the situation.

With a clear head and open heart I began to explore the idea that maybe — just maybe — I really am on a journey that is not as simple as I previously thought.

We are called to bring the Light to every situation we encounter.

And when we get knocked on our bums it could be a signal that our brightness has attracted attention from an adversary who does not have our best interest at heart.

I realize I am running the risk sounding like a doomsayer, of course. But when a friend explained to me that what I had been witness to was a sort of ‘dark arts’ training, I realized that I couldn’t naively allow the attacks to go un-examined.

Wearing my usual cloak of tolerance and compassion is part of what may have made me overlook certain warning signs. This may have contributed to my not protecting my energy better.

Whatever the source of drama and trauma in our lives, we are reminded that no one gets out of this life without some bumps and bruises. Whether its the ignorant bullies or crafty enemies that smack us around, we are made of strong stuff. And we have the power to shift our perspective and see these hard knocks as part of our game of ascension.

Even if they are not somehow designed by a game maker, we can still learn and grow from them. And no matter what, we can always choose to keep a perspective that gives us more power and wisdom rather than throw away our potential or retreat in defeat.

What do you think?

Have a listen to the podcast and share your comments with me over on my Facebook page!

It would be lovely if you would download the podcast episode and leave a rating as well, if you’re feeling generous 💜

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Originally published at www.andreapennington.com on April 2, 2018.