How much will you let them withdraw?

Is being a “people pleaser” worth the cost?

Are you a “people pleaser”? The type of person who is always there for a friend or family member in “need”? The person who people vent to and lean on on a regular basis?

Hey that’s not a bad thing. It means you’re reliable, people trust you, and know they can count on you. All wonderful qualities.

But when does it become a struggle for you? When do the “withdrawals” on your energy and time become a burden rather than a pleasure?

I used to always be the person who went the extra mile for others, and jumped at the opportunity to help others with anything and everything. However, as my life got busier — aka I had more personal responsibilities at work and otherwise — I realized it just wasn’t feasible for me to be perfect people pleaser anymore. I had to please myself as well. So rather than change my ways completely I made small “improvements” that made my withdrawals from others quality ones, and in turn, made me feel like I was giving a true piece of myself, rather than fragments all the time.

Here are a few to inspire those who need to consider the same:

  1. Focus on paying it forward when you know one day you may need the same
  2. Never forget loved ones, but know when you can say no — especially if they can ask someone else
  3. Consider asking for more time or another day to help so you feel less pressured
  4. Make a compromise on the favor — and see if you can get something that may help you too
  5. Keep the time you spend on those withdrawals to a minimum or a certain part of the day or week so it isn’t competing with time you need to focus on you or other things (aka your job).

#radiatedaily

image source — pixabay


Originally published at radiatedaily.com on March 31, 2018.