How to Deal with Toxic People
Don’t let “energy vampires” affect your mindset, sanity and overall health.
Have you ever had a friend, colleague or relative who just bothers you with their negativity? Or maybe you’ve met someone who doesn’t seem to have anything against you but somehow you don’t feel yourself at ease in their company. There must have been such toxic person or even people in everyone’s life.
Toxic people can appear in the form of an energy or emotional vampire, notorious pessimist or just a very negative person.
Being around toxic people is dangerous to your mindset, sanity, and overall health.
They drain all the energy from your body and intend to make you deviate from your path to success.
It’s essential to avoid energy vampires and learn how to deal with all the negative people surrounding us. But you can’t do it unless you manage to recognize them.
So what are the most common toxic people traits?
Whether it is a family member, a close friend, a business associate or a colleague, a toxic person always complains about their life and focuses your attention on their own problems. What is more, they tend to be very judgmental of you, whatever you do, many times for no apparent reason at all. Sometimes these negative people even blame you for their difficulties and struggles, not respecting any feedback you give them and never truly appreciating anything you do or say to help them. Energy vampires are around to take from you. That’s why they happen to be negative and often jealous of you.
Toxic people can have any of these characteristics or a combination of them. What they have in common is that they drain your energy and pull you down.
Do you recognize any of these characters in your life? I bet you can easily recall a couple of them.
Hopefully, you are not an energy vampire yourself. And if you realize that you share some of the toxic people traits: complaining on a permanent basis, being a ‘poor me’, judging others, focusing on what is not going well, constantly demanding from others to save you and pull you up, not respecting or appreciating other people’s time or efforts, then please stop it. Remember that you are not doing yourself any favor being this person.
On the contrary, you push people away from you and sometimes alienate those who sincerely love and care about you. This is nothing but a self-sabotage causing you to attract more of what you don’t want to your own life with your negative focus.
But what do you do if you have a toxic person in your life? How can you deal with energy vampires and end toxic relationships? Here is a simple 2 step process to follow.
1. Accept that the presence of energy vampires in your life has nothing to do with you.
Toxic people’s behaviour reflects their own deep personal issues. It has nothing to do with you or the way you treat them. They just want to drag you down with them, in their own misery, in their own negative outlook. Either they consciously realize it or not, it doesn’t matter, the effect is the same.
And even if they do seek your help, they never seem to accept any advice and recommendation for improvement or taking any action to get out of their misery. Instead, they prefer to suffer and want you to suffer with them. Therefore, they insist that you need to understand why they are miserable or sometimes they even go a step further and blame you for all the mishaps in their life. Even when you make every effort possible to make them happy.
2. Consciously choose that you will not take part in toxic people’s drama and negativity anymore, whatever happens.
After putting up with the idea that you are not to blame for the toxic relationships in your life, choose consciously that you will not participate in the life long misery of such people any more.
You can do this by either making the decision to be brave and totally let go of such person from your life. By this I mean really cutting them off, since you cannot change them and they shouldn’t be the kind of ‘friends’ or associates you want to have around you anyway.
If it’s a family member or another person who happens to be around you every day and you can’t get rid of them, change your behavior with them. You can protect your energy from the vampires by simply avoiding or minimizing contact with them when they are in a negative mode and not arguing with them once they start complaining or blaming you for their disasters.
Don’t try to convince them of anything, as you will just end up wasting your time and energy. Don’t start a discussion with them and stop yourself from replying to angry accusing e-mails or messages. Don’t try to offer advice or help, because toxic people don’t actually need it and thus they will not really take anything you say into consideration after they walk away.
Stop wasting your time with toxic people and making vain attempts to change them.
You can only take care of yourself, your energy and focus. So the only thing you can do to protect yourself from energy vampires is to be in a happy positive vibration and try to avoid such people, especially when they happen to be in their negative, grumpy, accusing mode.
The truth is, that if you love and respect yourself, you don’t give up your alignment with your higher self, good mood, and a positive mindset for anyone. When you appreciate your unique value and personality, you don’t let others disrespect you or your time, drain you or distract you with their negativity.
So if you have anyone around you who shares toxic people traits, it’s the high time to let them go and stop playing a role in their life long tragedy any more.
And I promise you — you will notice that every time you let go of a person or a situation that is toxic, another door automatically opens for new people and better experiences to show up.
The people you want to keep around you are those who believe in you, support you in your goals and dreams, appreciate you, value your time and energy, encourage you to move on, give honest feedback out of love and caring and lift you up beyond your fears. Make space in your life for this right kind of people.
Have you ever met any toxic people or energy vampires in your life? How did you deal with them? Do they still surround you? Share your story in the comments below.
Originally published at www.pavlinapapalouka.com.