How to like the job you’re with, while you find the job you love.

Photo by MARK ADRIANE on Unsplash

I bet you’ve been there, feeling stuck in a job you don’t want to be in, while you look for what you want. Heck, you might be there right now.

Days feel long when work leaves you feeling trapped. Resentment seeps in. It’s easy to wind up spending your day thinking, “Get me out of here!”

Resistance only makes it worse. In fact, I think sometimes the big lesson is figuring out how you can find a way fall-in-like again with the job you’re in, so you can untangle yourself from it emotionally and move on. It’s often when you crack that code that new doors open.

Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Honestly, I don’t know who originally said this, but it works here. First things first, you’ve got to deal with what’s making you hate your job.

Figure it out. Let the anger go so you can decide what else you want.

Sometimes bringing awareness to what you’re feeling is enough to help you see you have a choice. Maybe you don’t like the work itself, or the company’s ethics, or the industry. The problem might be that it takes 4 hours of your life to get there and back… and you fume all the way. Or, maybe you long to do something else, that actually matters to you, but feel like you can’t.

Whatever it is, get clear on the real issue. Those are your feelings and you get to decide how you want to respond to them. Will they take you down or spark something within you to make a change?

If you can identify what’s really bothering you, then at least you’re not throwing your anger around. When you soften into the truth, then you can make a new choice.

Whose rules are you following?

Whenever I’ve felt trapped in something, it’s because I wasn’t allowing my own needs to be expressed. I was working off of someone else’s “shoulds.”

Be on the lookout for these words rattling around in your thoughts, “I can’t… because.”

Take a good long look at those ideas. Are they true? Whose voice are you hearing when you think them?

You don’t have to go back and figure out everything from your past and why you feel disempowered or afraid to move on. You simply need to find what you value and own it.

Sure, there’s a process to that. One day you’ll feel strong and the next you’ll feel like you’re 12. That’s how you work it through. But in the process of that, you’ll discover all kinds of things about yourself as you practice standing in your own beliefs. Eventually, all those other rules will fall away as you embody your truth.

So what rules do you want to start to follow when it comes to your work, your career, what success is, and how you balance work with everything else that’s of value to you?

Focus on those and your day-to-day work life may not feel as limiting. You’ll also begin to create more of what you want… and not what you don’t.

Find meaning in what you do.

When you mindfully tend to the things that you are doing throughout the day, you can find some personal meaning in them. And that can shift your mindset.

Be present to the tasks that you’re doing. Focus on the things that do bring you joy.

Maybe you don’t want to be at that job of yours, but you are. So what might happen if you focused on what you can contribute? What might change if you were fully present to what you do and how you do it?

When you can pull your awareness back into the present moment and what you are doing — and find a way to connect to that moment — there’s a sense of purpose that can help balance out your daily work life. You might even begin to see what part of the work you do that you still like, or that feels important. Look for more of that in what you do next.

Where intention goes energy flows.

I’m not one to suggest just think happy thoughts and all will be well. I do believe we need to address and work through what I call the “not so yummy” stuff.

Getting clear on what’s really bothering you, understanding whose rules you might be working off of, and refocusing your attention on how you do what you do can help.

But so too can simply deciding to let go of the stinkin’ thinkin’ and see your work-life glass as half full.

Good vibes go a long way.

Listen for your negativity. Toss it. Reframe it and acknowledge that you’ve outgrown where you are and now you get to explore not only what you want next, but who you are growing into.

If you give yourself the time to do some of the inner work you need to understand what’s next, you can relax into the notion that something is happening. You’re not just stuck where you are. You’re figuring out the big ideas of who you are growing into and what that version of “you” needs when it comes to what you do.

You’re not trapped… you’re in motion. And at the moment, you have a place to be while you do that level of inner work.

The more you can have a plan for creating clarity around what’s next, the better.

If you’ve stayed too long at a job that’s no longer working for you, it’s easy to feel like you just can’t take one more day. But jumping ship isn’t always doable.

Have a plan. Do the inner work of personal change so you move forward in life. Then figure out what you want as that person. That’s how you avoid ending up in the same job next time!

While you do all that, let yourself find a way to stay happy 9–5, so you stay in the flow. The universe might just be waiting for you to stop hating on what you’re doing, so it can show you what’s next.