Invite Wealth Into Your Life
Without Breaking The Bank
I once knew a man who valued money above everything else in his life. I rejected money and everything it represented, because I valued kindness and generosity as more important. Just look at the collapse of Barings Bank in the Libor scandal — their actions lacked compassion. Money made people greedy, that’s what I thought.
What I didn’t realise was that a person’s relationship with money isn’t so black and white. That stories lurk behind our relationship with just about everything in our lives. For example, the man who believes money will buy him the status and respect, or happiness he’s always craved, but never had. All you see is the importance placed on wealth. We rarely get to hear the backstory.
The person who, through hurt, becomes emotionally detached; dissociated, and may appear to be “Cold-hearted.” Upon observing their life choices, I might have said, “Money makes you heartless… Ruthless… Cold and calculating,” none of which are true. S/he may have “numbed” to pain as a way of coping, and money becomes a focus as a distraction from dealing with personal tragedies in their life. But to state there is a causal relationship between money and a lack of emotional intelligence just because we perceive they co-exist, is to observe with blinkers on.
After neglecting my emotional well-being, my physical health suffered. I acquired autoimmune antibodies — Lupus, Sjogrens Syndrome and little critters attacking my thyroid. The doctors said they monitor me annually to see if they developed into the conditions, which they’d treat with medication. I chose not to wait and see. I dived head first into complementary therapies and along the way, I found trainers who were saying the same thing:
- Our thoughts create our reality
- Reality is not real - to which I’d reply, “of course it is.”
- Perception is projection
“Once your mindset changes everything on the outside will change along with it.” Steve Maraboli
My body had been reacting to my beliefs, emotions and my environment. Understanding the body-mind connection and how the body adapts to our beliefs about our environment helped me to heal my autoimmune antibodies.
Think about watching a horror film — if you believe it’s scary, it can start a chain reaction ending in you, “Jumping out of your skin.”
Your perception is: this is scary
You then begin to feel your thinking — you’re now feeling scared.
Your muscles tense up ready to run, fight or freeze, in the hope you survived the threat — a Friday night Netflix movie.
You’re mind doesn’t know the difference between reality and your perception.
The same biological processes that kick in when there’s a real threat to your survival are activated.
It’s the same with money
If you believe money is hard to come by, but you have to do whatever it takes just to survive, two things will happen:
- that becomes your reality, and you won’t experience money with ease. The scarcity mentality around money will keep you in survival mode, when you really want to be thriving financially.
- if you’re in survival mode, you’re probably heading towards adrenal fatigue, constantly reacting to the threats to your existence — bills, an overdrawn bank balance. Your basic needs aren’t met, meaning you can’t focus your energies on growth activities, because you’re living “hand to mouth,” so you stay in the same situation, unable to turn it around.
Here’s what you can do (be warned there may be some resistance, or denial)
- explore your beliefs around money — what did your parents say?
- see if any of these are familiar and, if so, you’ll need to update them for more empowering beliefs:
“Waste not, want not.”
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“Money burns a hole in your pocket.”
“Money is the root of all evil.”
“An honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay”
This assumes that we have to work hard for money and if it comes easily, it’s dishonest. It doesn’t allow money to come to you easily, nor does it recognise other channels by which money can come to you. For example, through inheritance, the lottery, or being gifted.
If your belief is around having to work hard for money, any money that comes easily to you, you’ll probably unwittingly engage in sabotaging behaviour, getting rid of it as soon as possible. All because it hasn’t been “well earned,” and therefore, “you don’t deserve it.”
“I’d rather be poor and happy than rich and miserable.”
People can be poor and miserable, and rich and happy. I believe these sayings were created in a time when families were surviving, as opposed to thriving, as is possible today. So, you made the best of what little you had. For many parents that meant focusing on creating happy moments and memories that didn’t involve spending money; not a way of being to aspire to in 2017.
You treat others, but rarely yourself
If you find that you don’t tend to spend money on yourself; you can’t justify pampering or treating yourself, perhaps growing up, your parents said things like:
“It’s too expensive.”
“I can’t afford it.”
“Do you think I’m made of money?”
“Never live beyond your means.”
It’s all conditioning from your childhood that you haven’t updated. Your parents and carers modelled your relationship with money at an age where you downloaded everything into your subconscious mind. We’re not even aware of these beliefs until we become curious about certain patterns in our life. And if you were a younger child who wore your siblings’ hand me down clothes, there can be guilt attached to buying new things for yourself.
“Learn from your history but don’t live in it.” Steve Maraboli
“Why am I always broke?”
“Why is it that as soon as I get money coming in, I’m landed with a big bill?” You’ll have some sort of money threshold that your current belief doesn’t allow you to breach, so you’ll have expected expenses that will enable you to maintain whatever belief is lurking in the deep recesses of your mind.
“I don’t want to be greedy,”
Have you ever caught yourself saying, “I don’t want lots of money just enough to…”? Your reality will be that you will never have a surplus of money. No disposable income, as such, to speak of, but you’ll always have just enough to get by. All because that’s the intention you’re putting out into the world.
“You can’t take it with you when you’re gone, so you may as well spend it now.”
If you’re not one for saving money, perhaps your parents or carers believed there was no point to saving, because “You could get run over by a bus tomorrow,” and “You can’t take it to the grave with you.”
In order to change your behaviour and become someone who saves money, you’ll need to rid yourself of those types of outdated beliefs. While there is truth in the statements, they were used as justification for not saving money.
Ask yourself, will they take you closer to your goal or further away? It’s less about how true the belief is, and more about how useful it is in supporting your goal. If it’s not useful, change it.
Everything in this universe, including money, is energy.
It’s just paper; a form of energy exchange. But beliefs, operating at a level below our conscious awareness, perpetuate the habits, patterns and beliefs we bought into as children.
If you came from a working class family and you acquire wealth, that can question and challenge your family values and your identity. So, at a subconscious level, we might sabotage our success. Yet, what may feel like a rejection of your family, as you become affluent, while other family members’ financial situation remains unchanged, is actually a rejection of their values and unhelpful points of view. As you move forward in life, you may need to be reminded that rejecting their beliefs doesn’t mean you no longer love them, you just don’t need to identify with their unresourceful money beliefs anymore.
If there’s a particular money problem I’ve become aware of, what I found really useful is:
- Tapping on your money beliefs (there are videos on YouTube from people like Margaret Lynch and Brad Yates tapping on money issues)
- Writing it out in your journal, without editing, just allowing ideas to flow freely on to the page, to get to your underlying beliefs
- Asking your subconscious mind, just before you go to sleep, to find the beliefs creating your current situation, and release them, or at least bring them into your awareness. Ask that you’re allowed to remember what you’ve seen in your dream upon wakening. Keep a pen and paper by your bedside so you can write down whatever wisdom is shared, before you get up, start your day and completely forget what you dreamt about the night before!
You can also search online for money manifestation groups on Facebook, free challenges or courses, to help facilitate the discovery of these beliefs in your blind spot.
Please take responsibility for your wellbeing, and if there’s a chance you may trigger some traumas from your past, ensure you explore in a safe environment with a qualified practitioner.
“You are a product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective. Analyze your life in terms of its environment. Are the things around you helping you toward success — or are they holding you back?” W Clements
Learn to love money, instead of fearing it. You might want to invest in books like Catherine Ponder’s The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity (1962), to help you change your money mindset. Hang out with millionaires — or study them to model their success, after all,
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Jim Rohn
Tricia Mitchell is a coach, trainer and spiritual guide who channels divine beings and knowledge to help clients find their purpose, heal their businesses and lives. She previously worked in business and management for 18 years before commencing her life purpose as a healer.