Loneliness is more than just a study; it is a Reality

Article first posted on Linkedin on 5/5/18.

It’s a Saturday afternoon and what am I doing? Surfing the web, reading articles on Linked in, randomly posting Facebook statuses, and sharing some of my client’s quotes on Instagram. No, I am not out celebrating Cinco de Mayo, nor am I outside basking in the warmness of the Spring weather we longed for just a few weeks ago. I am intentionally engulfing myself in cyber world in hopes to figure out why young adults have been found to be one of the loneliest generations.

When I was a child, we spent the majority of our after-school days playing outside with friends. We rolled around in the grass, played “Hide n Seek,” hoola-hooped, jumped rope and ran around in circles until the street lights came on. Nowadays, this is far from the norm.

Neighborhood streets are bare as youth are locked behind closed doors mesmerized by gaming systems and their smartphones. But it’s not just the youth who do this, we as adults do the same. We have allowed our connectivity to the world limit our connectivity to those in the same home as us. Laptops, tablets, and smartphones have become our third arm. We panic if our battery runs low and we don’t have a charged father than we panic from leaving our child buckled in the car on a scorching hot day. How did this happen?

The reality is that as a society we are so connected from the present because we are wrapped up in the details of other people’s lives. We want to know what people ate, where they traveled to, what new job they have or who their new romantic interest is. Personally, even as one whose business success depends on digital and social interaction online, I believe that we are resorting to hiding behind the screen to be distracted by our reality — some of us are unhappy with our current situation of living.

There, I said it!

We have lost the art of fruitful communication, and in turn, those we are coming up in the society we have created don’t know how important communication is to establish relationships. We give our youth electronic devices to distract them and to keep them busy. The only thing they know is what the internet teaches them. Picking up a book seems absurd. Leaving your phone at home while you go you go to dinner with your family causes you great anxiety. We fail to keep friends because we allow the hustle and bustle of being a professional or a busy business owner get in the way of remembering to check on others. The reality is that we have forgotten what it means to be people who are apart of a community.

If we want to make sure the next generation of people are well-equipped to be contributing members of society, we must put down our phones, close our laptops, power down our tablets and spend time with those who look up to us. Ask the youth you have in your life how they feel about global news — the politics, the mass shootings, the state of education. Ask them how they think about their future. Ask how they feel about you and others around you. Loneliness is lessened we take the time to slow down and listen to one another.

So, my question to every person who reads this is: What is one thing you will do daily moving forward to bring back a feeling of connectedness in your life? I’d love to read what your ideas.

I am a Brand Communications Specialist who happens to be a millennial. I’ve written for Huff Post, Essence Magazine Online, Forbes, and more. To read more of my work, go to www.maleekahollaway.com. Also, follow me on Instagram and Twitter at @OfficialMaleeka.