This Is What Happens When You Face Your Fear

Or, How I Finally Got Myself on a Plane to Europe

For nearly a decade I was afraid to fly long distances. It happened suddenly, this irrational fear of mine. One day I was flying across the globe solo without a thought, excited to explore the world, the next I was stuck in Philadelphia where I was in school, hardly able to fly home to California for Thanksgiving.

My wanderlust didn’t abate, but my world closed in on me, and for a long time I let my fear get the best of me. It was painful, to say the least.

I decided recently that enough was enough. I coach people every day to face their fears, to feel their fear and do that scary thing anyway, to live fully without limits, especially the limits they create in their minds.

So when my fiancé suggested we take a trip to Greece for a few weeks, I determined it was time to truly walk my talk. We booked nonstop flights from San Francisco to Frankfurt and then we’d make our way to Greece (the latter part of the journey I could stomach, the former not so much). I admittedly lost sleep for the first few nights after we booked our trip, anticipating how I would feel flying for ten and a half hours. Would I get anxious and freak out? What had I done?

As the trip got closer I knew what I had to do: focus on how proud I was of myself for doing this scary thing rather than indulge the nerves and the what-ifs, and remind myself what I was going to get on the other side. So I psyched myself into excitement and pride and before I knew it we were walking down the jetway onto the plane.

It certainly helped that we booked business class seats. So we started our airport experience in United’s Polaris lounge in SFO — a beautiful, serene space, with friendly staff waiting on us, checking on us, cleaning up after us.

And then I found myself in United’s new Polaris business class — complete with Saks pillows and thick cozy comforters. The side-by-side seats feel like you’re sitting in your own living room, with the benefit of getting your own TV and the equivalent of your own lazy boy, with endless permutations of comfortable sitting and laying positions. And of course it’s not that little screen we’re used to from the regular seats way, way back there.

I’m also almost embarrassed to comment on airplane food as I’m about to. I ordered short ribs that were legitimately delicious, and I didn’t mind the ice cream sundae cart for dessert, or the 3-tiered sweets trays and sandwiches and snacks located in what I’ll call the “hang out” area, where my fiancé and I regularly got up to stretch our legs and eat even more between naps and movies.

When we landed I realized there was good news and bad news: we were finally free to roam about the world, but we were most definitely going to have to do it in business.

We arrived in Mykonos tired but thrilled. We were staying at the Royal Myconian, right at the beach, and our view was spectacular. I drank it all in with a Mythos beer and my first bites of fresh sea bass that the hotel had perfected. I took a dip in their salt-water pool, overlooking the beautiful Aegean sea below. I lounged on some of the cushiest chaises and read my book and watched the trees blow in the Mykonian wind.

Walking through the resort that evening — the pool area aglow in glittering lights — breathing in that fresh, beachy air, feeling the soft, dreamy buzz of vacation — I thought about what it took to get me to this incredible place.

Fear is a funny thing. It’s a straight jacket that you tailor to your perfect specifications, and for which you are the only one with the magic to escape. It looms so large and then — poof — you have overcome it, you have done that thing that was so very terrifying.

Amazing what happens when we step into all that we are, when we muster up every ounce of courage we’ve got and despite our fear, we go for it.