Social Anxiety, Autism, & Fear of Public Humiliation
Autism is very tied to my identity because it is a label that I found myself. I went and got an official diagnosis afterward because I wanted to know it wasn’t a figment of my imagination and because, if you can fight your way through the stupid ablist practices of the bureaucracy that’s supposed to help autistic people, you might be able to get some help with things you find difficult.
Throughout that whole process, I discovered that social anxiety is something that most autistic people struggle with. In fact, it’s so common that I just assumed it was hard-wired into the autistic brain to react to social situations with anxiety.
Fast forward a couple of years, and I’m working with my therapist to process my fear of public humiliation using EMDR. EMDR stands for eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, and it is one of the most effective methods for processing traumatic events or any events that result in negative self-beliefs (also known as blocking beliefs or blocking thoughts). As I’m writing this, I’m in the middle of the process, and I’ve been using my meditation techniques in between therapy sessions.
What I realized at my latest therapy session, was that a part of why I’m struggling to let go of the blocking belief tied to this fear — the belief that I’m bad, that I’m not good enough. Part…
