No time to take it easy with sick baby

Originally published March 3, 2017, in the Times Herald-Record of Middletown, N.Y.

I had another column planned this week, but then Genevieve got sick.

I picked her up Tuesday from daycare, and after feeding her, she brought it all back up. Not cause for panic, but it was weird to say the least, since she never does that.

Later that night she awoke and I fed her. Again, all back up. And every feeding for the next six hours was exactly the same.

So Sarah worked from home Wednesday. We visited the doctor. We played cautiously the entire day as we traded parenting shifts. I got a little work done later in the afternoon, but that’s fine, because all you want is a healthy child. And thankfully there was nothing to be worried about, likely a stomach bug.

But it’s amazing: Your life stops, but she doesn’t.

Thursday is my day alone with Genevieve. Considering she was coming off the bug, and the wind was whipping all day, I figured to take it light, stay in the house and maybe take a short drive.

And then my stomach tightened.

Oh, man.

New parents, if you haven’t yet experienced the joy of being utterly disgustingly sick while needing to care for your child, you haven’t lived. It’s a wicked balance of “I don’t want to stay on this couch all day for her sake,” and “I really want to stay on this couch all day for my sake.”

We did not stay on the couch.

But when we did, Genevieve would find every possible way to induce pressure on my stomach. Then I was off to the bathroom again. And though she’s only four months old — nah, she knows what she’s doing. Now I get what those parents mean.

At one point I wanted to get her to sleep, but bobbing or rocking just made my stomach worse. So I did the next-best thing: I took us outside and into the car for a short ride around town. I figured I could stand driving for about 25 minutes, just enough to put her to sleep and put me in position to take a catnap once we arrived home.

I parked the car. She was asleep. I gingerly took her up to our apartment and set her down. Still asleep. I quietly crept into the living room and fell onto the couch and began to close my -

Awake! She knows what she’s doing.

Later we both fell asleep, but 10 minutes into the nap my stomach rebelled again. We both awoke fussy, and I figured that was the end of me trying to sneak in some sleep time.

Sarah soon arrived home and took Genevieve away. She visited some friends, then returned with a happy baby and a giant carton of wonton soup. I love Sarah.

Everything is starting up again, and I promise, I’ll deliver a column with more useful content than ever next week. My detractors are probably laughing at “useful content” right now, but hey, they read this far, right?

In a little more than 100 days I’ve learned more about life than in the previous 11,688 days. This time, I’ve learned that obstacles can’t sit there unchallenged. Stomach bugs come, but life doesn’t stop for them. Just ask Genevieve. She didn’t give me any time to carp.

And thank goodness for that.