The Snippets 03

Written March 2016

I told myself some years ago that if I was not in the process of doing something then in 10 years I wouldn’t have done it.

It was rule number 3. 2014. That however is not what happened. I had a lot of dreams, I still do. The one thing I never wrote was that I would not be a dreamer instead of a doer. Since in the following year, I did not commit to my own-self, I was irresponsible about my own life. Of course it’s easy to say things in retrospect. Hindsight is 20/20 after all.

These days it’s almost as though I’ve forgotten what passion feels like, that fervent headrush one gets when speaking of something they love. What seems to drive some people to do all kinds of things. They seem compelled.

In my case, some time ago I decided that trying to find motivation to do anything and stay motivated was a losing system. Such things are always in motion, my mind changes, and soon I realized that doing things when I feel like it, never actually gets anything done. So the answer was doing things simply because they had to be done. For who? Why?

So over the years I did a lot of things believing that it simply had to be done. I still didn’t get much done. I spend a lot of time, thinking, reading, planning, but not so much doing. As such I have to ask myself why?

Why do I procrastinate so much? Why do we? Why does it seem difficult for some to be decisive and for others it seems as though it’s natural? Over the years I’ve made up at least 10 different reasons and solutions to why and none have remained in my mind. None has stood the test of time or remained unwavering against the raging waves of my mind. Today however I have a different view. I think the mind is fickle, one day I have clarity, the next day it’s foggy, another day I feel down and unmotivated, another day I’m hyped and pumped.