5 Tips for Talking with Your Child about Homelessness
From Martha Ryan, Founder + Executive Director of the Homeless Prenatal Program
2 in 5 families in the Bay Area cannot afford their basic needs. This reality is difficult to comprehend as adults, let alone broach the topic of such vast disparity with our children. How do we pass along our values of generosity, compassion, and empathy in the midst of the poverty and homelessness we see on our streets every day?
Today we bring you a few tips from Martha Ryan, Founder and Executive Director of the Homeless Prenatal Program, one of Tipping Point’s first grantees. A mother of two and a caregiver to many, Martha’s work uses the moment of welcoming a child into this world as a time to create positive change and break the cycle of generational poverty. Here Martha brings a few concrete ideas about how to begin teaching our children about these important issues.
1. Be straightforward, clear and honest. Your child will know if you are saying or doing something you don’t truly feel. Bring forward what you believe and experience when you encounter homeless people, even if it feels vulnerable for you to reveal.
2. Leverage your child’s imagination. Ask kids to try to imagine what it would be like if they didn’t have a room, toys or books. Once they start to have a sense of that, brainstorm with them on how to support someone else by sharing or giving what we have.
3. Know that every child will react differently. One evening, I was walking home with a box of pizza with my children, and we came upon a man who was clearly very hungry. We decided to give him the pizza. We stood and talked with him for just a moment and then moved on. As we walked away, my son, the introvert said, “That was nice,” and my daughter, the extrovert, asked, “Who is going to bring him breakfast?” And I thought, great — they were each, in their own ways, able to learn from that exchange and show empathy.
4. Allow your child to lead. Whether it’s extra toys or allowance money, giving is best when it comes from the child themselves and reflects whatever resources they have. The other day we had a nine-year-old walk into Homeless Prenatal Project and handed me $95 dollars because he wanted to share his birthday money with the homeless. I turned to his mom and thanked her for teaching him the importance of sharing: the more your child can own the opportunity to give, the better.
5. Match your availability and efforts with actual needs. Volunteering as a family is great, but it’s important to be aware of what the organization you serve truly needs. We often ask people to donate to a specific project, like particular tools someone needs for welcoming a newborn baby, or toys we can package up and keep for birthdays for families who can’t afford to purchase gifts.
The holidays are a great time of year to give as a family. If you’re looking for opportunities in the Bay Area, we recommend adopting a family through Compass Family Services.
You can also host a donation drive to support mothers and babies in need. Homeless Prenatal Program accepts the following items: diapers, sizes 3–6, baby wipes, baby formula, baby food, children’s books, maternity or baby clothes (new). Drop-off hours are Fridays, 9am to 3pm at 2500 18th Street in San Francisco.
For more, see our Tipping Point Family booklet, a guide to discussing your family values and giving back action plan.
