To Read or… Not to Read: Looking for Compromises

«I believe it is an important time to bond with my child, and many of my own favorite memories from childhood involve my parents reading to me. I love that it also instills a love for books and reading.»

Father, 4-year-old boy

I totally agree! And with exactly these words from the «Kids and Family Reading Report» by Scholastic I want to start my story.

I have two daughters and they adore books. Nothing special but there’s one detail: my younger daughter is two and a half, my senior one is almost a teenager, she is 12.

I’d rather tell you two absolutely different stories with equal happy ends. That’s from these stories that I have learned totally different lessons but have definitely come to a conclusion: READING IS A COMPROMISE.

«How did you accustom your children to reading books?»

I hear this question from every person whom I tell about our «relationship» with books.

And my answer is: «As simple as that. We have got used to them».

My story is about how (by doing simple things) we have managed to develop one of the most, in my opinion, useful habits — A HABIT TO READ.

Story № 1.

My first daughter was born when I was a student. At that time I had to read a lot of educational literature: legal, economic, psychological. I did not have enough time for either children’s literature or adult books. The only option was children’s songs (amazingly, sometimes it was a kind of light rock music) and… poems! It was my first compromise. Poems «switched» me over from difficult professional literature lexical constructions and my daughter was luckily fond of them. We quickly passed from simple rhymes on to verses-stories. Rhyme, rhythm, sounding — everything was there, and the issue of children’s reading was solved for some time.

After that we easily «jumped» to another level: long stories. At that time I had more free time, so I used to read 5–10 pages with great pleasure. It was my second compromise, voila!

However, when it came to independent reading I was at a loss. I needed a serious but reasonable weapon to fight a child’s stubborn laziness to read independently. And I found it. Everything happened, as it often does, by accident. One day my daughter was being naughty and I told her:

«I won’t punish you, but you have to read three pages YOURSELF».

You may not believe it but the three pages were not only read but also retold!

I decided to repeat my experiment the next time she behaved badly. The result was the same. After the third case of her misconduct, she told me without waiting for the verdict: «I’d rather go and do some reading»

We both laughed and the «reading» punishments were abandoned. Although her behavior sometimes left much to be desired we had come to the third compromise: no «reading» punishments in case she reads on her own without any reason.

Today my daughter spends more time on reading than I do, she reads in any weather and road conditions, she has an «excellent» in literature at school and writes short literary notes. It seems to be a good result from a small habit, doesn’t it?

Useful tips from story №1:

– read what both you and your child like. Atlases, maps, encyclopedias — you can choose any alternative to classical forms such as fairy tales and verses;

– gradually switch over to more complicated formats. Almost any story is adaptable with the help of gestures, intonation, games. Remember that a child can remember a word having heard it twice! Therefore, if you introduce more complex books in your children’s library you will give them a chance to enrich their vocabulary from an early age;

– get involved in reading, join the story, turn into a book character. Well, sometimes I have to be a snail, an octopus or even a knife! Your child will definitely be grateful to you for the game and attention, and you’ll undoubtedly derive pleasure from such a transformation;

– write your own book. Nothing can be better than a story invented by mum or dad! I decided to give my children a New Year’s gift and composed the fairy tale «Ellis and Mr. Christmas». It’s a story about a fantastic creature who can see the future.

Believe me, the best author for your children is you, the best book — the one written by family members. The best gift for me was a sparkle in my kids’ eyes when they were holding my book for the first time.

Story № 2.

By the time my second daughter was born a habit to read had completely got hold of us so books were brought into her life naturally and inevitably. She had a long way of entering the book's world that was ahead of her. And I was facing daily work on cultivating a habit to read.

Actually, I had no special plan. The only thing I was absolutely sure of was: BOOKS HAD TO BE EVERYWHERE AND HAD TO BE DIVERSE. A child should see many books, touch them, thumb through them, play with them from an early childhood. These simple things are small steps towards a very useful habit.

This time I did not experiment with methods but I focused on the choice of books, the illustrations and the physical space management in a more serious way.

Space. «A BOOK IS ALWAYS AT HAND» is my main motto. Therefore we have books everywhere! The child can always reach them. In fact, she hasn’t got a choice like: a remote control, a dad’s or mum’s gadget or a book. The first two devices need to be found at first. The book is always at hand.

Illustrations. Little kids percept things visually. They like bright, colorful pictures. Unfortunately, many publishers abuse it by offering books with quite bad art solutions. Be careful in your choice. The illustrations we love the most are those by Olivier Tallec, Sara Lundberg and Evgeny Antonenkov.

Choice. I personally trust the selections made by writers, book bloggers, publishing houses (for example, Caldecott Medal, John Newbery Medal, Goodreads.com (for example, Best Christmas Holiday Books, NoTimeForFlashCards.com, Boolino.com).

Useful tips from story №2:

– try to find the format that suits your kid. All children are different: some like board books, some — female magazines or cookbooks. Anything is ok to form a habit. My younger daughter, for example, doesn’t like books with plastic eyes, but she adores National Geographic or OnAir magazines;

– notice and encourage. Children are very inquisitive. So if they are interested in textbooks of the senior child or your book on information style, try to maintain this interest, tell about the book, look through it together with your child, examine the cover;

I have an IMPORTANT NOTE regarding the above said: the book must not injure mentality or do any other harm to the kid’s health! Therefore, make sure you examine its contents before your child opens it.

– alternate activities connected with books. Try to differentiate reading itself (for example, before going to bed) and educational reading;

– take the book everywhere you go. A familiar book associates with home, a place where everything is quiet and clear. Therefore, the books in your handbag are not only entertainment or training but also a way to calm the child down.

So if you are gentle but persistent in imparting a habit of reading to your children, I am sure, the result will be unexpectedly pleasant as it has happened in our family. Make a deal with yourself and your child about what is better for each and both of you. Make compromises and read with pleasure!

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