HUMOR

Using a Shower Shammy, or Whatever You Call It

Don’t be a squeegeeist

Why is that Squeegee in there? Photo by and of author

My wife thinks that I should use the squeegee before wiping the shower down with a shammy. I say that real men like me use the shammy and wring it out with our manly hands as we go. A squeegee is stoo-oo-pid because the shower has rounded corners and all the dumb squeegee does is push water from one place to another. Useless. A shammy soaks up the water on the walls.

Yes, I know it’s actually a chamois, which is pronounced “shammeeze”, but through your nose as it is a French word. There are a lot of French words ending in “ois”, and they aren’t plural, which is ridiculous.

That’s one of the many reasons I dislike the French language. No wonder my ancestors on my mother’s side left France for Canada, and then, finding that the fools there still spoke French, moved down into a place where we know how to form plurals.

The French got this word from the Latin “camox”, which was a type of antelope! Can you imagine using a antelope to wipe down your shower walls? I know it’s a specific type of antelope, so maybe it’s tiny, but still, wiping your shower with a tiny antelope would be ridiculous.

How did “camox” become “chamois”? Because you cannot pronounce “x” when speaking through your nose. This…