SATIRE
Bama rejects “stolen” Georgia Championship, demands recount
“We won.”
“It wasn’t a game, it was a HEIST, and the American people will not stand for it.”
That was the conclusion of some outraged Alabama football fans who are refusing to accept a 33–18 loss to the Georgia Bulldogs in the National Championship game. Top Level Sports sat down with Bob Clyburn, a spokesman for the hastily organized Crimson Tide Trophy Reclamation Committee, who vowed to take their grievance all the way to the Supreme Court.
“This game was stolen in a heinous act of treason. Do we live in a country where Georgia players get to strut around in national championship caps, RIGHT AFTER THE GAME?”
For Clyburn and the CTTRC, such a convincing loss points to a far-reaching conspiracy.
“Let me draw you a map: Stetson Bennett has never won the big game, EVER, and NOW he does? Georgia hasn’t won a natty since 1980 and NOW they do? We never throw a pick-six to lose a game and NOW we do?”
“It was almost as if their level of talent and effort and coaching were equal to or even superior to ours. That kind of thing just doesn’t happen in a just society.”
“I believe we witnessed the most elaborate Deep Fake in sports history. Advanced AI. Next gen…
