TRAVELING THROUGH GRIEF

Leaving Loss Behind in Toronto

Finding respite in the city and countryside

Photo by Scott Webb on Unsplash

I booked a trip to Toronto from my home on Vancouver Island less than two weeks before finding out that my son had died by suicide. All thoughts of travel left me. The days passed in a blur of phone calls, visits to the funeral home and to my son’s apartment complex. Several small family gatherings took place where we looked at photos and told stories. My grief was buried in the business of death, but I knew I would have time for that later.

Then, less than three weeks after the police had come to tell me about my son’s death, my brother went into the hospital. Eighteen days later, he would also pass away.

My trip to Toronto was scheduled for April 28th. Less than two months since I bought the tickets, so much had happened. I considered cancelling the flights, but decided staying home would do nothing more for those who had passed or for me.

I boarded the plane with some measure of relief. I would be crossing the country to be with my grandchildren in another province, and leaving behind, albeit temporarily, the need to face up to the tasks death brings with it.

The sleeplessness that had filled my nights might not disappear, but being with family that I…