When focusing on one thing only is painful
Yes, painful…
I´m known for being a cat with a laser, which means that my focus changes all the time. …
For me, it is really hard to focus on only one project and I have been like this since I´m a kid. In my childhood, I was always doing several things at once like ballet, jazz dance, tap dance, bass classes, English course…having a busy scheduled always made me happy, it is part of who I am.
As an adult, I kept having a lot of projects and courses and was always happy doing it all together. However, on the Ph.D., I was kinda forced to focus on just it…which is basically impossible and painful.
Yes, painful.
Painful because my head starts its “auto sabotage program” and I keep thinking that I will fail and lose this ONE thing that I´m doing and I´m losing all the other magical things that are happening outside this bubble.
I know that for normal people who can focus on one project what I´m saying doesn´t make sense and some people actually feel frustrated that I always do too much stuff at once. I know that but that is who I am.
We all know that people are different from each other and we have different personalities, but some people have a really hard time to accept the other.
So please, if you are annoyed with me doing a lot of crazy projects just focus on this: this is who I am and that´s how I´m happy.