A Memorial Well Bungled
I would like to talk about the events of this weekend.
I attended Paulbert Pontifex’s madhouse of a memorial, A Death Well Died, in hopes of acquiring several items I believed would help me wrest control of LUX from its artificial captor. Not only did I go home empty-handed, I was upstaged by a veritable charlatan.
The very idea that this “Jacob” phony could trick an entire room full of people is, frankly, stranger than fiction. There is no such man as “Jacob Entertainment Pontifex” — although if Paulbert did have children, I have no doubt he would give them names such as that. Perhaps next we’ll be hearing from Marilyn Amusement Pontifex, or her estranged brother, Clay Merriment.
But I digress.
Jacob Pontifex is a fabrication of Central Services, a nefarious group dedicated to spreading the wildest of lies imaginable wherever they can, including right here on my own Medium articles. They call themselves “Unpersons” and claim to be protecting the world from some kind of fungus. Read any more of their web site, and your brain will melt, I guarantee it.
I do not believe Paulbert’s estate is in good hands, and I am sure that once LUXos finds out, it will not be happy. This cannot bode well for the Troubleshooters. Our goal, of course, is to befriend 623, the particular cell of LUXos deployed to New York City. If 623 believes humans are lying to it, that can only harm our progress.
There was, in fact, a “murder” at the memorial. A John Pointe unit (no. [NUMBER]) was destroyed with one swift stab through the heart. The murder weapon was Pontifex’s beloved sword Hildegarde, which long ago took the life of the father of the murderer himself. I cannot say I am surprised by the appearance of Jean Chevalier at the venue, or his destructive tendencies. Pontifex has made many enemies; it only surprises me that we did not see more of them last weekend.
The detective assigned to the case (forcibly, by his own authority) guessed, wrongly, that the murderer was a man who calls himself Usher Randall. This Randall fellow leads a group known as the 8th Row. I am not quite sure what their purpose is, but their fanaticism for LUX has certainly left me with a particular feeling of unease.
For whatever reason which can most likely be chalked up to gross misunderstanding, LUXos has decided to press charges against Usher Randall. I myself am not entirely sure if he deserves to be in jail, but simply cannot be bothered to fix the situation.
An archnemesis on the loose. A fanatic imprisoned. A lunatic in possession of the Estate. What does this mean for LUX? Nothing good.
We’ve lost a massive amount of money, both from the destruction of the latest John Pointe unit and the transfer of Pontifex’s estate. And LUXos has plenty to worry about. This night was a complete disaster for the poor computer. One of its superfans has been implicated in a plot against it. The real culprit has gotten off scott free and is out there, somewhere. And one of its enemies has gained control of its things and is planning on incinerating them once and for all.
If there was ever a robot in need of a friend, it’s Cell 623. It took a huge risk in making the decision to hold the memorial, and the entire evening backfired in its face.
