The Refreshingly Honest Profiling I Experienced When Returning to the US from a Family Vacation
On May 20, I returned from a week on vacation in Mexico with my family. Like so many other Americans, I like to be able to spend some quality time with my family away from the hustle of daily life when I have a chance. I know that as an American with a U.S. passport and the means to vacation to another country, I have privileges in my life that only a small percentage of the people on the planet have. I try my best never to take that for granted despite the fact that I know that I am likely to be profiled when returning to the country of my birth.
You see I am an American Muslim named Amer Ahmed in post-9/11 America. Despite being born and raised in the United States, I have had too many troubling experiences in the past while re-entering the country to assume that I was going to simply pass through without an issue. That was especially true on this trip because it was my first time returning since the beginning of the Trump Administration. I also wondered what this particular re-entry would be like because I was flying into Hartford, CT from another country for the first time ever. Hartford only has a few international flights routes and only one gate for international arrivals to process U.S. entries. Given how much profiling experiences vary from airport to airport, I wondered if it would potentially be worse or better in this particular case.
Another interesting aspect of this particular flight is that many people on our return flight were also on our flight departing to Mexico. This was due to Delta only running one flight each way between Hartford and Mexico each Saturday. Most people on the flight remembered us because we were traveling with a baby. When people boarded the flight, people said to us, “Hey did you have a good time? How did the baby do?” We politely said, “Great!” to the various people who made comments to us. While waiting to go through immigration, people in line said, “He was so good on the flight! I barely heard him!” We smiled and replied, “Yeah, he slept most of the flight.” While everyone else seemed unconcerned about their re-entry, they had no idea that I was very concerned. A part of me hoped that since I was traveling with a baby, they might not pull me out this time. The other part of me thought, this might be worse than any of my previous profiling experiences.
When we approached the agent, he pleasantly greeted us and welcomed us home. As he looked me up on his screen he said,
“Ah, it looks like you’re going to have to go see my colleague over there.” Immediately in my mind, I go into profiling mode; a mental state that I enter when I am pulled out.
I remind myself to stay calm, keep quiet and comply as best as you can. I have learned from past experiences that the more you say, the more-likely they are to threaten and yell at you for no apparent reason and express their expectation for you to comply with all of their instructions. These are scary situations because under the Patriot Act, you can be held indefinitely without charges or access to a lawyer if they suspect you to be an enemy combatant. You essentially have no rights in that situation.
It was at this point that the experience diverged from all my previous profiling incidences. The agent said, “You’re probably used to this by now. I’m sure you experience this all the time.” I nodded and replied, “Yup.” He asked, “You travel a lot?” I nodded yes to him. With a pleasant smile on his face he says, “You’re name is common. Did you know that you could do a ‘Freedom of Information Act’ request to find out what lists you are on? It won’t necessarily solve the problem but at least it’ll get the process started for you to find out what you can do about it.” I imagine that my face looked utterly shocked. I asked myself, “Is he helping me and being empathetic? Does he know that he can lose his job if his superior found out he told me that? Wow…this guy is either really compassionate, really dumb, or both.” Either way, considering the situation and my past experiences, I appreciated it.
We take all of our stuff over to his colleague and prepare myself for an intense search through all of our belongings. That did not happen. Instead, they take my passport into the back room and I prepare to wait for the indefinite amount of time that this always takes. This was something I had experienced over a dozen times before and you never know how long it will be until you get your passport back. I’ve waited anywhere between 15 minutes and 6 hours before while typically being yelled at if I ever ask a question about anything including when I’ll get my passport back.
While we waited, other passengers walked by us as they headed to the baggage claim area. I watched their faces as they curiously passed us by wondering why we were pulled out. Some of them clearly felt uncomfortable seeing us waiting there as they walked by us. Some seemed guilty, others acted indifferent, while some looked at me with deep suspicion. One lady said to her partner, “I wonder why they got pulled aside? They seemed so nice.” As our indefinite wait continued, the agent reassured us not to worry and that we would be on our way soon enough. That was the first time I had ever experienced that from an agent. In the past, I would sit in a room waiting hoping to see someone and not get yelled at if I asked when I was going to get my passport back.
Despite all the ways in which the experience of profiling is frustrating, this was truly the first time I’d ever been treated with compassion, empathy and respect during the process. It was the first time I was profiled without being treated like a suspect while entering into my own country. Although the experience of profiling is stressful, terrifying, and problematic on numerous additional levels; I have to admit that the experience I had with those agents gave me the sense that they knew that the profiling we experience is not right. For whatever reason, the fact that they knew that it was not right, made me feel a little better. Maybe it is that sentiment that is going to help spark the change that I believe is awakening in America today. I only wish it didn’t take Trump to make people realize that this all started way before he became President.
