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Pro-Lifers Refuse to Answer a Question that Shouldn’t be Asked

The abortion debate needs to end to focus on the real issues and protect life

The Question ‘Pro-Lifers’ Refuse to Answer

The research cited in this article about women’s post-abortion emotions doesn’t stand up under scrutiny. And, we should never get to the point in our society that we have to ask the question about what happens to women if they have illegal abortions.

Variables such as the circumstances, what these women are taught about the children they carry, and the fact that “geographically diverse facilities” within 150 miles of each other is underwhelming in terms of diversity. Only 73 percent completed the interviews, 62 percent were already mothers, and the highest percentage of women were white. If these women all went to Planned Parenthood, for example, then they received a similar spiel about what was happening to them and the baby they carried during the first trimester.

As far as post-birth abortions, call it what you want, but when a woman is forced to go into labor to dilate her cervix and a baby is removed intact, the the child has been born. The so-called “partial birth” abortions leave the head of the baby inside and puncture or crush the skull to deliver the baby fully. What a gruesome thing to do to a child.

Some states allow abortion up to the due date with the caveat that the mother’s life is in danger or the baby is not viable. In other words, it is plausible that a full-term child could be killed in the name of abortion based on a single doctor’s assessment and the mother’s wishes.

Question of Viability, Defect, or Harm to Mother

The advances in science have changed the age of “viability.” In 2019, a baby born at 23 weeks, weighing only .5 pounds lived and is healthy and thriving today. The earliest surviving preemie was born at 21 weeks and is now a healthy toddler.

Pro-abortionists, or anti-lifers, (you can’t have two pro sides in an argument), claim one issue is protecting the mother. Of the 6 million pregnancies in this country, only .0116 percent result in complicated deliveries and the death of the mother. Many of those deaths were post-birth and had nothing to do with the pregnancy itself, but of some other issue, like an infection.

Pregnancies that involve a child abnormality is between 3 and 4 percent. Still a very low number of pregnancies.

Claiming the lack of fetal viability, defect, or harm to the mother is a deflection from the real issue. Research indicates that women having late-term abortions, which are most often associated with complications, have abortions for the same reasons as women in their first trimesters.

I do not want to minimize the trauma associated with rape. I will only give this statistic. A single act of intercourse has a .05 percent chance of resulting in pregnancy.

Of the 6 million pregnancies, 18 percent resulted in abortion.

Why Women Choose Abortion

We need to be very clear on the reality of even getting pregnant. In one menstrual cycle, 85 percent of women TRYING to get pregnant will not succeed. Of course, sexually active women probably have sex more often than once every 26–28 days.

Another fact to consider, available contraception is 95–98 percent effective, if used properly. Granted, some women cannot use contraception and some couples don’t want to use contraception. And, 51 percent of women having abortions claim they used either a condom or short-acting hormonal method.

The number one reason women have abortions is they do not want the child. Full stop.

A majority already have children. Depending on how you slice the data, a different majority are in their 20s. They don’t have a complications. They know they are carrying life.

They don’t want a baby. Please quit saying abortion is about anything else!

One person argued (in the responses) that taxpayers would take care of the children birthed should abortion ever be illegal again. I don’t see this circumstance being any more true than it is today.

Hundreds of thousands of couples want children and can’t have them. Adoption is ridiculously expensive and inaccessible for most people.

Let’s quit fighting about what will happen if abortion became illegal and focus on making adoption easier and less expensive. Have the government subsidize that instead of abortion.

We have amazing technology and medical research capability. If the issue is that women don’t want to be pregnant, then let’s shift the funding for abortions to funding more research on contraception.

Quit Lying to Yourselves

And all this crap about pregnancy being about a woman’s body has to stop. It’s BS and deep down every woman knows it. We all have a moral conscience that won’t allow us to believe the child carried is not actually a child.

Otherwise, why is it such a hard decision for so many women? And, why are the majority trying to avoid pregnancy? The truth is these women know sex can result in pregnancy and pregnancy results in a child. It’s called logic.

Let’s think a minute about what happens to a woman’s body when she’s pregnant. Because, abortion is not about a woman’s body — it’s about a baby, which has been clearly determined.

1. Her abdomen expands. So what? It goes back after birth and it doesn’t change much until the third trimester. Are women so vain they can’t stand the idea of an expanded abdomen for 3–5 months?
2. Her hormones elevate. And? A woman has the best skin of her life when she’s pregnant. And all those hormones, not much different than PMS. Plus, I had some of the best orgasms of my life while pregnant, because of those hormones. (Oh, btw, post-partum depression? Very much a real thing post-abortion, too. Can’t change the hormonal shifts just by removing a baby from your womb. Pointing this one out because of the article claiming that emotional response after abortion isn’t a problem.)
3. Boobs…pregnant boobs, same as the tummy. Plus, I’ve had friends who said the only time in their lives they had boobs was during pregnancy. Enjoy it. They will go back to normal. Don’t worry about sagging unless you plan to breastfeed. Besides, boobs sag as you age anyway. If you care that much, get implants.
4. Your vagina. To give birth your cervix and the birth canal have to open up, that’s just the way it is. Newsflash, your cervix has to dilate for abortion, too. It returns to normal. The birth canal, the part of the vagina most women care about, it also goes back to normal. And, you can exercise it. Another newsflash, especially for you 20-somethings most likely to have an abortion, your vagina changes with age. Start the exercises now, maybe urine won’t leak as much when you’re in your 40s.
5. Gaining weight (other than baby weight) — not a given. Most of the weight women gain when pregnant is fluid and the baby itself. The rest is up to you. Guess what? That’s the same choice you make with your body now. Want to eat a whole package of cookies? Go for it. Want to eat kale and do yoga? That’s fine, too. What you eat and whether you exercise are choices that affect your body.

The claims of “it’s my body” are selfish and vain when we really consider what it is about a woman’s body that changes.

The life inside of the woman has a body of its own. That child is not a part of the woman’s body. Yes, it’s dependent on the woman, but it’s not her body.

What a woman who aborts is really saying, regardless of whether she admits it is, “I don’t want to carry a life to term. I have my own life and this life inside of me is an inconvenience. Therefore, I want to maintain the right to evict this life from my womb until I choose to use my womb at a more convenient time.”

Women who have abortions don’t want to carry and deliver life. It’s that simple.

Quit lying to yourselves and everyone else. Women will rationalize their pregnancies any way they can to make themselves feel better about the choice they know is ending a life.

Personal Testimony

How do I know? I was that girl. I considered every option. As an 18 year old, freshman in college, I was terrified.

I first consider running away to have my baby at a woman’s home for unwed mothers. I’d give the baby up for adoption. But, I didn’t want to hurt my parents by running away. Of course, I also wanted to finish college.

Then, I thought about confessing to my parents, carrying the child while staying in school and giving the baby up for adoption. That was a no-go. I was scared to tell my parents. And, I was embarrassed for people to know I was pregnant.

I contemplated suicide. I sobbed for hours, days. I was a young, immature Christian. I had made a huge mistake and I couldn’t see a way to fix it.

I talked to the school nurse and campus chaplain. No one deterred me from getting the abortion. I wasn’t referred to anyone who could have helped me make the choice for life. Ultimately, I rationalized that God valued my life and success over the life of the baby. I could have children later. He forgave me for sex outside of marriage. He would forgive me for the abortion, too.

I was wrong about the value of life. But, God does forgive.

I cried through the entire procedure. I was 12 weeks pregnant. My baby girl danced on the sonogram. She was a very active baby and I imagine would have been a delight to raise.

During the procedure, I cried out “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” over and over while the doctors and nurses performed their tasks. I had the abortion the “old fashioned way,” by D&C. They opened my cervix and sucked her tiny body out of my womb. They took a few minutes to make sure “everything was OK”, which I know now means they reviewed each tiny piece to see if any of her body was missing.

Then, I sat in recovery for 20 minutes, sipping juice. No one counseled me. I got scant details about what to expect. I was given some pills, but I don’t remember for what. I felt weak. Numb. Tired. The friend who drove me took me to get some lunch. I barely ate the soup I ordered. I went back to the dorm and slept.

For the next two days, I bled. My body expelled big clots of uterine lining and afterbirth kinds of junk. Painful cramps gripped my body. I cried every time I went to the bathroom to dispel the bits.

For the next 10 years, I hated myself. I didn’t have much self-respect before the abortion. The little left in me evaporated.

Eventually, God led me to counseling where I was in a group with at least 10 other women — all white, all with stories just like mine. I discovered the grace that had always been there. I learned to forgive myself.

Before you berate me for MY experience, your may be completely different. Maybe you weren’t scared. Maybe your mother took you and you had cake and ice cream afterwards. Maybe you have no ill feelings about the choice at all. The fact remains, you did not want to be pregnant at the time you were pregnant. Either you didn’t use birth control or your birth control failed. Whatever the case, according to the data you were probably in the category of “now is not a convenient time for a baby.”

When women in this category finally face reality, we can have a different and much more productive conversation about what needs to change. Abortion isn’t birth control.

Provide Women ALL the Options and Facts

The 20-something year old girls who choose abortion probably don’t have all the facts. Most likely they are not given information about other options. I surmise they are scared to death. Lonely. Desperate.

I can almost guarantee they aren’t thinking about their bodies or government regulations. They don’t know what to do and no one is helping them think it through beyond their current trimester.

The 60-something percent of mothers who choose abortions don’t want another baby. Who knows why? But, it’s not about their bodies. They know in 9 months they’ll have a child.

Let’s Get Real about the Issues and Change the Approach

I surmise the vast majority of feminists who are pro-abortion/anti-life haven’t faced an unexpected pregnancy, especially given the data. They don’t really know how it feels or how they might react.

Until we deal with facts instead of opinions and lies, we cannot collectively improve the tragedy of abortion and focus on useful means for giving women the right to choose when their wombs will occupy life, while protecting the babies they carry when they don’t.

If women truly care about other women, then let’s not ever get to the point of asking “what if…”