Introverts Usually Don’t Smell Scorched

Or something like that.

Mary Liga
Unclutch Your Pearls
3 min readAug 24, 2021


Photo by Levi Meir Clancy on Unsplash

So what if I like to put a little distance between my thoughts and the potentially scathing words that could inevitably come spewing out of this pie-hole of mine?

I’m introverted.

I’m an Enneagram 5 (The Quiet Specialist).

I’m a wise-ish midlifer who’s seen and heard enough to know what’s up.

Introverts have really come into their own as of late. We’re the dark horses among all life-livers.

Make no mistake, we’re welcomed as creatives and in creative jobs, but not until recently has our mysterious and quiet demeanor been appreciated in the real world.

I maintain that we’re terribly misunderstood.

Is something wrong? People ask.

I never know what you’re thinking, they remark

You’re so quiet. If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I’d have many, many dollars.

At least.

I’ll call us introverts: the pausers.

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

For the sake of this conversation, the non-pausers would be the extroverts.

They get an awful lot of praise and attention, and I guess I can see why.

It’s because, in order to get anywhere, it seems like you need to be a boss, speak your mind, stand your ground, make your point, and all of the other shit that has historically been a key identifier of successful people.

Disclaimer: I’m not saying that all introverts are pausers and all extroverts are non-pausers, I’m drawing a distinction based on a hasty generalization.

I can’t believe I’ve gone decades feeling inferior to my extroverted, non-pausing counterparts. In life, and at work.

Now that I’m older and wiser, I see things more clearly.

And I’m calling bullshit on it.


It’s a common differentiator between the introvert and extrovert communication styles.



Mary Liga
Unclutch Your Pearls

Margarita-loving copywriter, life coach, home design junkie, and host of The Badass Midlife Podcast.