Unconforming 04 / We’re all a little sexist, probably more than we think

by unconform studio | December 2019 issue

Issue 04 / We’re all a little sexist, probably more than we think

Dear Friends,

Unconforming’s last issue discussed authenticity. I chose to write on authenticity because women repeatedly request it from their organizations, especially when it comes to gender equity in the workplace.

I received two types of reactions to the issue, both equally valid & welcome: Some of you really resonated with it. Some of you challenged the notion of authenticity, asking what it means to be authentic. Fair question, because it is complicated. Research shows that humans perceive themselves to be more authentic when they are aligned with their so called “higher goals.” Such perception bias hugely contributes towards sexist behaviors in the workplace, especially when it comes to hiring and promotions.

An example of authenticity perception bias:
“Behaving in ways that are consistent with your higher goals, such as announcing your new humanitarian nonprofit, is typically perceived as more authentic by yourself and by others than authentically watching Netflix while eating that stack of glazed donuts. Even though, sorry to say it, but both behaviors are really you.”
—Source: Scientific American (thanks for sharing, Shekhar!)

How it shows up in the workplace:
“Studies have shown that a belief that you are not sexist makes you less objective and more likely to behave in a sexist way. Men who believe that they are objective in hiring decisions are more likely to hire a male applicant than an identically described female applicant. And, in organizations which are explicitly presented as meritocratic, managers favour male employees over equally qualified female employees.”
—Source: Invisible Women, Caroline Criado Perez

“We can be blind to the obvious, and we are also blind to our blindness.”
— Daniel Kahnemann, Thinking Fast and Slow

When authenticity perception bias meets invisibility of gender gaps, we get organizations overlooking and ignoring sexism in the workplace. We get organizations saying that they value female leaders, promote men instead and believe they are authentic. Many talented and exasperated women quit jobs over this ignorance. I asked these women what they would like to see in their organizations instead. Their answer: an inquiry.

1. Study ascension rates to check if women are promoted slower:
   “Women who were way more talented than me were taking two extra years to get promoted whereas “this guy” seems to be on the fast track. [At least] track how long each person’s ascension took.”
   –A senior manager at a financial firm
   
   2. Analyze performance reviews for personality feedback, by gender
   “The man is who the man is, and sometimes he’s a terrible person. The woman is pushy, abrasive, confident, wrong tone, too scary. Women are 10x more likely to have negative comments about personality.”
   –A managing director at a health-data firm

Wow. This isn’t a case of “admit sexism just because.” These are data-driven, practical suggestions for organizations to research, analyze and see what is. It made me think of what one of our (resonating) readers shared in response to our last issue:

“What I love most is the unique take on authenticity…the call for companies to truly own their process towards inclusivity and equality is unique. I also love that it leaves room for acknowledging that this IS a journey, it takes time, and it takes effort.”
— A senior researcher at a tech firm (thank you for sharing, C!)

What are your companies doing to acknowledge gender bias in the workplace? What do you wish they would do? Hit reply and let me know — I’d love to hear from you!

— Mansi

Postscripts:

✨Contribute to the conversation: Much of this newsletter’s content comes from Project Femlead: an opportunity for women to reflect on their professional paths with a gender lens. You can now submit your reflection & stories through this quick form. Please contribute, and invite your female communities to share their stories too.

✨Check your privilege: On a recent The Daily episode, Pete Buttigeig says “I remember resenting the idea that you’re supposed to have to come out, right? Straight people don’t have to come out. Why do I?” This reminded me a sweet moment with a close friend. We had been laying on the rug in my living room, staring at the ceiling, as I asked her, “when did you know you are gay?” In the gentlest tone, she responded, “when did you know you are straight?” That one question taught me that we all sit on a privilege spectrum — and to make a practice of checking it regularly. Project Femlead participants often tell me they wish more coworkers would check their privilege. What’s the first thought that came to you while reading this? Hit reply to share, I’d love to hear from you.

✨Read: “North America is still 165 years away from achieving gender parity,” quotes Kit Krugman of co:collective, while she lists specific ways to reduce that scary number.

✨Forward to a friend or two: We’re four issues old today, and so grateful to have your inbox as a home — thank you. I’d love to keep growing our community, so please feel free to forward this email onwards to your friends — they can subscribe here.

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