A Field Guide for Social Media

A Dribbble Story

Social Media Field Guide

I guess since I’m like the youngest one here and fresh out of design school they put me in charge of explaining Social Media to the whole bunch of idiots in this company. I mean they have no clue. They say things like “Do we need to Social Media this?” My boss asked me during my interview if I knew anything about Social Networking, and if so, why wasn’t it on my resume? Da fuck? I get it now though. She used to think Google was the internet, but her son changed her default home page to Facebook so now she thinks the entire internet is Facebook. I looked him up. It’s a bad idea I know.

So I have to explain this shit to them. They want it all official and documented. They said a brochure, but fuck all that. I’m going Field Guide. Part Field Guide anyway, and part children’s book. They can keep it in their pocket or purse. Access it anytime. I’m telling you, I have to dumb it way the fuck down.

Billy the Bison is Facebook. Busy Beaver is Google. Danny Deer, and so on. From the outside these animals might not make any sense. I get that. I started with the fucking bird as twitter and shit. Believe me. I’m not stupid. But that’s not how these people think. I had to get in their minds. Know your audience. I studied for this shit. I’m a designer. What I realized is that you can’t label the social network with the animal, you have to use the animal as the base. Reverse it. Identify the network to the animal. This is fucking Idaho after all.

So the bison? Big-ass behemoth, but dumb as dirt, just standing around in giant herds. That’s Facebook. The hare is always working and on the move and a little neurotic and connected via these underground tunnels. That’s LinkedIn. When I explain it that way their confused, gaping mouths turn into smiles, and their whole shit lights up like they finally fucking get it. It’s really rewarding.

So if you’re looking at this and wondering: Why that shape? Why those animals? Why are some on the ground and some in the sky? Fuck you. You have to read it. You have to live it. You have to work here.

Dribbble Stories is a series of entirely not true, 100% fictional stories based on designs found on Dribbble.

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