Why can’t work feel like play? On pursuing life in perpetual beta.
Meeting John Williams was quite serendipitous.
We both just happened to find ourselves at an idyllic coliving space out in the Serbian countryside on the exact same weekend.
I was there for a weekend of reflection and renewal. I was frustrated with my job and pondering next steps. It felt like I had been grappling with the “what do I want to be when I grow up?” question for literally forever at this point, with pressure intensifying by the day as my 30th birthday crept closer and closer.
John was there for relaxation as well, but seemed far beyond those internal existential career crises. A Brit likely in his 50s or so, he seemed relaxed and refined, yet with a clear openness to adventure and newness.
With just 4 guests at the coliving space that weekend, the communal lunches became intimate gatherings, pushing beyond the simple “get to know yous” and digging right into questions like why are you here?, what are you looking for?, and how are you building your life?
I dove straight into my woes: When we spend the majority of our lives working, why is it just societally accepted that we’re miserable? Why do jobs seek to box us in to simple, specialized tasks? Why can’t companies nurture human potential and possibility? Why can’t work be engaging — helping us to learn, grow, and give something to the world? Why can’t work feel like play?
And then the words that changed everything:
“Funny you should say that. I happen to have written a book on that exact topic.”
Screw Work: Let’s Play has since become my career Bible. In it, Williams pushes us to think about our lives and what brings us joy. He encourages us to make our own “play books” where we investigate, imagine, and explore what our lives currently are and could possibly be. He has us dig deep into ourselves, sussing out our career heroes and who we envy — and in so doing shows us why admiration and envy are both important and useful as we navigate our paths to play.
He challenges us to take on small projects with Play Wednesdays where we: (1) picture what a great Wednesday would look like if we were to take a year off to play, and then (2) make that a reality by incorporating a 10 minute play-snippet into all our Wednesdays.
But most importantly, he inspires us to play by drawing on the wisdom of others. Here are a few of my favorite quotes that Williams has peppered throughout the book:
- “If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.” -Robert Fritz
- “We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” -Joseph Campbell
- “Begin somewhere. You cannot build a reputation on what you intend to do.” -Liz Smith
And my personal favorite:
- “We all have two lives, and the second begins when we realize we only have one.” — Confucius
Perhaps what I personally find most powerful is his “Happiness Formula” which has since become my mantra in work and in life:
Happiness = Pleasure + Engagement + Meaning.
- Pleasure — you enjoy your work
- Engagement — you feel like you’re learning and growing
- Meaning — it’s important to you and important to the world
I now evaluate my projects, potential jobs, and interests on whether the happiness formula is met. It has become a useful framework for viewing potential activities on a deeper level — encompassing my past (is it using skills I’ve developed and enjoy using?), present (will it be interesting because of what I’m learning?) and future (how will this work affect my world and the world at large?). And most importantly, its acted as an important point of pause and reflection that I previously ignored when deciding to dive into new things.
Of course, not all roles will necessarily incorporate all three of these elements. But what’s important is that they all exist somewhere in your life, whether within the scope of your profession or not.
That said — if you’re seeking a life of play, are searching for fulfillment, or simply want to feel less alone in your career journey and path to play, I encourage you to give Screw Work: Let’s Play a read. And once you’re ready to dive in and get “paid to play,” Screw Work: Break Free is his sequel that provides frameworks on how to do just that.
