‘Say thank you!’

I was reminded!

A slow death of gratitude?

I remember growing up I was always reminded by my elders to say thank you almost every time. Even if the odds where not in my favor, like when an older person told me off for my bad deeds, I had to say thank you.

Now I say eff that!

I was told it was good for me to be polite, so I had to say please before saying anything. Even when I was asking for my pen from a friend who had kept it for more than he should have, I had to say, “please, can I have my pen back?”

It worked, I always got my pen back, that wasn’t until I grew up, until saying please sounded weak.

I started demanding for what wasn’t even mine in the first place.

They kept on telling me you need to smile when you meet new people. “Smile to make somebody’s day brighter,” they would tell me. They even included biology, it was good for my muscles, otherwise I would risk growing old faster.

I smiled and I loved it, when they looked at me, they called me adorable, even strangers that didn’t know me, just because I smiled.

I kept that smile on my face, until someone asked, “are you a clown or something?”

How could I smile at that? Should I say ‘thank you’ and move on like they said? Or better say, “please be kind like I am trying to be to you right now?”

Damn, how do grown ups make decisions?

I ended up taking the choice that wasn’t in my ‘box’ and punched the guy in the face. “Take that sucker!”

Violence is not the solution kids! I learnt that the hard way.

Was I wrong all along? Was I supposed to say thank you? What if he did it again the next day, he needed to feel the rage I felt, don’t you think?

I am up in here trying to be nice and you are calling me a clown? I was told people reciprocate goodness, what is his problem?

Growning up, all the values I have been taught as a child have been put to test in so many ways. The results I have been lectured on, or the consequences of my action have proven to be different each time.

Sometimes I was a hero for the wrong reason, sometimes I was a villain for the right ones too.

I have learn’t that if I was to be a person who reacts with consequences in mind I would be confused for the most part of my life.

I developed a set of principles.

If my principle is being nice, that means even if it makes me look weak I am going to be nice. Sometimes being nice makes you look too good, which isn’t always good, sometimes it makes you look stronger. All these are results that can change, but a principle doesn’t.

Even when you teach your kids, you don’t tell them, ‘be nice because it gets you sweets,’ no, sometimes it gets them suspicion, sometimes it gets them a punishment.

You do it, not because of the results, but because its a principle.

Now, say thank you! 👏