Seas The Day (Crab).

On Florida, the beach, punny names, taking control and being pinched by a crab.

Josh Spilker
Jul 22, 2017 · 2 min read
beachy sign that i just found on pinterest

I’m in Florida, near the beach. The place we’re staying is actually a pretty nice little tiki hut thing sort of near the ocean (it’s a good walk or bike ride), but it’s raining.

Earlier today we drove through the rain to the end of the inlet where all the houses were large with gates, and with stupid house names:

Heaven Can Wait.

Livin’ On The Edge.

The Boat House.

Seas The Day.

There is a certain group of people that I don’t quite understand that find these names enjoyable and relatable and would like to have their life savings/vacation home named as such.

“Seas The Day” is my absolute favorite and I really like it as I’m sitting here writing a blog post while it’s raining, because I’m taking the day by the horns or reins or whatever your preferred metaphor is for “control*.”

*On this trip, I brought a copy of The New Yorker, because I am in that phase of life or something and they had an article about George Strait in it, yes George Strait the country singer. As a Nashville resident, I feel semi-obligated to read stories about how my city and it’s main export is regarded, especially in media outlets that do not regard such things very often. They talked about the simplicity of George Strait and all the puns that his name fosters because of that simplicity. He only wears cowboy hats and bunched up Wranglers. He really is a cowboy and has roped stuff. There you go for “control.”

The last time I was in Florida, my 9 year-old nephew was pinched by a crab. He was walking in the water and the crab pinched him and hung on for a good long time and he started shaking his foot and crying and eventually he broke the crab off, but the claw was firmly latched to his foot.

My three year-old daughter saw this and now forever has questions about crabs. She has a supremely good memory and is worried about crabs coming to get her out of the “big lake” (ocean). We told her that the crab was more afraid of us than we should be of it, and that’s why the crab pinched my nephew. This kinda makes sense, but doesn’t really matter because once a crab pinches you, that is the reality, no matter the reasons behind it.

Now, I’ve picked out three or four crab-related things to offer her as gifts.

Stuffed animal crabs. ‘

Coloring book crabs.

Sticker crabs.

I hope it will work.

She should seas the crab.


I’m Josh Spilker and I wrote a book about God, tacos, empty malls, food trucks and mini-golf. You can get it here.

Josh Spilker

Written by

Content Strategist & Author. Here’s my new book, PLS ADVISE: https://amzn.to/2RAGXMF.

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