Vaguely Feel
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Vaguely Feel

vaguely feel like eating at Red Lobster

Yesterday, I took a road trip to the suburbs and then I saw all my favorite friends. A Chili’s next to a Kohl’s next to an Old Navy. And then there was a Red Lobster.

not the exact Red Lobster I saw

Last week was my grandma’s birthday and I didn’t get to go to her party but I called her on the phone and my parents, my uncle, my aunt and my grandma all went to Red Lobster. They ate shrimp. Lots of shrimp they said. And biscuits. Too many biscuits my grandma said.

Did you know you can buy Red Lobster biscuit mix at the grocery store? It’s true because I ate some for Christmas. They look like this:


Where is Cheddar Bay?

Instead of tanning spray do they use Cheez Whiz?

What if you ate these for breakfast? What if you didn’t?

How can you eat seafood if you live in Middle America?

Is it possible to build a Red Lobster if it is not next to an Olive Garden?

If they changed the name from Red Lobster to Dead Lobster do you think it would make a difference?



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Josh Spilker

Josh Spilker

Writer, Marketer, & Content Strategist for startups. Never miss an article: