vaguely feel like sharing these bad poems from Google Drive that contain a reference to ‘Cars 2’
seems true
baby repeatedly spit out black beans when given by spoon, only to eat them when picked up individually, seems true
soccer person repeatedly fails at kickball, but excels at kicking the ball, seems true
person who runs copier machine, repeatedly complains abt being ‘in a rut’, seems true*
(*) mixed metaphor
will send alerts abt ‘mixed metaphors’
like TV weathermen predicting the possibility of ‘mixed metaphors’ coming soon
35% chance of ‘mixed metaphor’ 2mrrw, seems true
next novel
next novel is abt the person who fills redboxes & hangs up posters abt adam sandler
next novel is abt the guy who stops working at walgreens for the cvs across the street
next novel is abt the woman who said ‘get on outta here’ as i drove by on my scooter
next novel abt street ‘artist’ selling stuff in a pop-up shop except he doesn’t know enough abt ‘hipster demo’ to call it a ‘pop up shop’
next novel abt the same street artist setting up his ‘pop-up shop’ outside a defunct bar called ‘club miami’
next novel will be called ‘what’s going on? not much’ probably
next novel will be called ‘when are you buying the new iphone’ probably
next novel will be called ‘emo diaries’ probably
next novel will be called ‘google maps no longer shows ‘club miami’ probably
post-snackwave
coffee cup w/ an ergonomical handle that is now useless b/c of more prominent thumb use in society
coffee cup w/ a logo that said ‘no logo’ but has now faded away
how abusive people are to their tastebuds everyday eating bland blended with boring
next time water’s got you down, be like ‘no, not this time i will drink you’
the thing abt water is that it’s so slippery, it makes a formidable opponent for sure
always keep yr eye on the water, don’t let it out of yr sight
VS
blended families vs smoothie bananas
winsome excuses vs rhizome meniscus
unsteady ladders vs seafood platters
phone cords vs lonely fjords
cheat codes vs uniqlo
post season vs bee keeping
madden vs aladdin
my favorite movie RN is ‘Cars 2’
shooting arrows at new camaros
interstate collision, i mean two warring forms of concrete
summer movie: ‘concrete vs asphalt: the last rock’
summer movie: ‘concrete vs asphalt 2: where the sidewalk ends’
destroyed honda accords, decimated dodge durangos, flipped lincoln town cars
i sold my truck to the kid down the street, who flipped it literally and figuratively
feel like more esoteric things are ahead for me
reignite yr passion for freemium apps
very excited abt this new box of GIF newtons
we are hiding in that email acct you forgot you had
is this like an inspirational rom com?
every like you make, every tweet you fave, I’ll be watching you
pls send all correspondence via large, gangly attachment
pls send all correspondence via ICQ
pls send all correspondence via USB drive created in 2003
pls send all correspondence via floppy disc
very influential article in the New Yorker about the YO app
