In the Time of COVID, Keep Going
By Perry Tancredi (cross-posted from Perry’s personal account)
A lot of you know I spend my summers leading adults in simulated survival situations in the Utah high-desert. We travel as groups for weeks with limited food, water, and information. Students don’t always know where we’ll camp for the night, if we’ll camp for the night, how long it’ll take for us to get there, and what it will look like when we arrive. Honestly, instructors don’t always know either. Not surprisingly, many of the lessons I’ve learned in the desert apply in the front country and in the experience of this pandemic as well, and I thought I’d share them here:
The challenge you face is rarely the challenge you expect. Students come to our school with an expectation of what is going to be hard about their experience. What they actually face is almost always different. Students who expect a physical challenge leave early to tell their parents they love them (it’s happened). The biggest surprise to me in this quarantine so far has been how much attention my 4 year old has needed. In one way it’s completely manageable. In another, it truly does make every day a challenge and, for me, acknowledging it helps manage it.
Everyone is suffering. Everyone shows it differently. Some people wear their suffering on their sleeve. When they’re the only one, it can feel overwhelming. Without fail it eventually comes out that most of us are suffering, just in different ways. That shared experience eases the burden any one person faces. It’s pretty common for the slowest hiker to apologize to the rest of the group only for others to thank them for setting a reasonable pace. You may feel alone, but know that you’re not and even the simple act of sharing your struggle can help others.
People find strength by finding purpose. When students are struggling one of the best things they can do for themselves is help someone else. That can look like carrying a load, lending a hand, talking with them, and sometimes even just walking beside them. Knowing you’re helping someone even just a little bit can ease your burden. If there’s no one around to help, knowing that you’re accomplishing something can do the same. In the field that can look like reviewing a route, looking for resources, or preparing a place to sleep. People who have responsibility for others sometimes have a tendency to take away their responsibilities to reduce their stress — but that often has the opposite effect. Find your purpose, don’t over-commit, and be sure you’re also taking care of yourself. If you oversee people, allow them to do the same.
Uncertainty breeds anxiety; Acceptance gives you control. A lot of students focus on all the things they don’t know and can spiral into a vortex of anger, stress, and doubt. People start making bad choices. Taking a minute to assess what you do know and what is in your power can settle your mind and focus your decisions. You may not know the route, but you know that you’re walking. You may not know if you’ll sleep cold tonight but you know the sun will warm you tomorrow.
You’re capable of more than you think. None of us actually knows what we’re capable of until we’re tested. I could tell you that you can hike for days without food and feel fine, or survive a night in below freezing weather without a blanket — and you might believe me. Until you do it though, you don’t really know it. Without fail, students will tell me how surprised they are at what they accomplished. Humans naturally rise to challenges if we allow ourselves to truly face them. Humans are also social animals and we face challenges better together.
This pandemic is providing us challenges in every aspect of our lives that we probably have never faced. You will surprise yourself with what you’re capable of. You should forgive yourself for where you think you may be falling short. Do the best you can. Your best isn’t perfect but it’s good enough. Reach out to others and don’t be afraid to ask for help. You may be doing them a favor by asking. Know that you’ll be stronger and know more about ourselves on the other side of this. Remember that Winston Churchill quote:
“When you find yourself going through Hell, keep going.”
Perry Tancredi spends his summers in his happy place, leading trips for adults (and occasionally his son) with the Boulder Outdoor Survival School in the Utah high desert. You can find more information at https://boss-inc.com.
