My Growth.
Four years ago, I knew quite strongly who I was. I knew that my involvement in high school stemmed from athletics in swimming, music in singing, and in playing the violin, and various clubs and executive boards I always somehow managed to balance. It wasn’t that I didn’t excel academically, but that I was never in the top tier of students who had received a 34+ ACT and a full ride scholarship. I was never the student who dedicated endless hours to their homework, because being actively involved and feeling connected to my high school was how I felt I made change. Just like the quick weather changes in Chicago though, my high school experience was over as quick as it began.
Being the daughter of immigrants and knowing that their lives were shifted to give you a better one gives you an outlook on life that no one can truly comprehend. Growing up in a suburb of Chicago where most people don’t look like you only adds to that confusion, furthering an internal divide you may not even have realized that you had. It wasn’t until my four years of high school were over, and my new chapter at DePaul University had began that I truly realized, I was about to begin at a new school knowing quite literally nothing about myself other than the fact that I was different.
I decided my freshman year not to get involved in many clubs on campus as I wanted to get acclimated and make friends, and because of such, I had worked the previous year of high school nearly 40+ hours a week as a Swim Supervisor for the pool at the local gym, saving up every penny I realistically could to be able to spend without fear my first few quarters on campus. However when I woke up one day to a $10,000 hold on my Campus Connect account a few days before Winter Quarter class registration, I no longer had that privilege. My choices were to move out and end my DePaul journey faster than it had started, or to obtain a last minute loan and begin working to pay it off. I made my choice, and my journey to where I am today truly began.
Kicking off my sophomore year, I knew that though my involvement in working off campus was a necessary financial obligation, I felt as though something was missing. I was missing that same drive that pushed me through high school, and because of that, involvement in me sparked. I joined DePaul’s chapter of Camp Kesem, a camp aimed at bringing a free week of camp to children whose parents are either currently or have experienced cancer. In my role as Volunteer Coordinator, my job was to outreach to DePaul students as potential camp counselors, train them, and have them commit to a week of fun and freedom for a chance for these campers to feel like they had no worries in the world.
Though the camp experience and befriending the campers was an absolutely incredible one, I quickly realized that Camp Kesem wasn’t where my heart lied, and the realization alone in that was a confusing one. I understood that I loved impacting others lives, but that Kesem may not be my personal outlet for that. During this time I had also been hired on as a Chicago Quarter Mentor, assisting in the first year transition between high school and college. I began attending many trainings, one of which was a Mission and Ministry training, facilitated by Joyana Dvorak, a woman who has since touched my heart in ways I cannot begin to describe. She made the realization that creating systemic change and being Vincentian did not directly tie hand in hand with being Catholic or attending church, but that I, as both a Middle Eastern and Muslim woman, can identify with Vincent’s eye of seeing the change you wanted to be.
I decided to act on that realization, and on Joyana’s words. At the end of my sophomore year I decided to run for DePaul’s Student Government Association as the Executive Vice President for Student Affairs, and throughout a long and hard campaign process, I eventually lost by a mere 60-something votes. The experience made me realize what DePaul’s SGA can do, and I refused to give up. I was brought on as SGA’s Executive Assistant, eventually moving up to Chief of Staff, where I worked alongside the 2017–2018 senators and cabinet on a myriad of policy issues and improvements, including DePaul’s 2024 Strategic Plan. I sat in on a committee focused on improving retention of students, and had the idea (in combination with the wonderful mind of Emily Hoey, SGA’s VP) to see if an expansion upon the already existing Chicago Quarter model could be feasible. When I became DePaul SGA’s President last May, that was one of the first items on the agenda to tackle. Emily and I met with Provost Marten denBoer, and the ball on Student Success Coaching began to roll.
Understanding that how I felt was exactly how Louise de Marillac felt most of her life, prior to her Lumiere moment. Never knowing her mother and feeling like a constant outsider, her husband suddenly falling ill and passing away, it wasn’t until she had her moment of realization where she understood that God had a plan for her. She understood though the deep depression she had been feeling was so heavy, that she was placed on this Earth for a reason. She took that moment of empowerment and ran with it, and my journey on the Vincentian Heritage Tour did the same.
VHT made me realize the importance of self-grounding. At any point in time, millions upon millions of thoughts are racing in your mind, unable to fully concentrate on any one issue, or experience. Being able to truly be present during this week was an internal challenge, as my mind was attempting to focus on personal issues that were ongoing at home. It wasn’t until we began our church excursions that I was physically able to see St. Vincent & St. Louise’s impact upon the world that I realized, I was really here. I was really walking in the footsteps of a 400 year old legacy that has changed the lives of so many people by ways of service.
Service can be exemplified in so many ways, and one of the most prevalent in the Vincentian family being the dedication to eradicating global homelessness. Depaul International is an organization that focuses specifically on this, with subsidiaries of the organization being Depaul USA, Depaul Ukraine, Depaul France, and DAX, a Depaul International partner that focuses specifically on students at DePaul University that may experience homelessness. We had the privilege of meeting Andrew, the director of Depaul France, who spoke to us about the importance of meeting people where they’re at, and how Depaul France exemplifies that by offering a mobile shower van, driving around Paris and assisting those who are experiencing homelessness that may be physically unable to go to their location and take a shower. Understanding various tenets of being Vincentian is something all people may showcase, such as honoring one’s human dignity, but being able to see that in action is something I will never forget.
On September 2nd, 2018, DePaul’s Student Government Association had our cabinet retreat where we each wrote personal mission statements. Mine read as follows:
“I, Nahal Hashemian, as President of DePaul University’s Student Government Association, want to be better. I want to be a better friend, a better scholar, a better leader. I want to be better at recognizing that I have flaws, and that not everything is the end all, be all. I want to be better at breathing. I want to be better at recognizing that my ideas and my passion have value. I need to take time for myself, and I need to realize that doing so is okay. I want to listen to the students of DePaul University and help uplift the incredible voices of both students and student leaders at this Vincentian institution and commit myself to acting as the bridge to change that can and will.
This year, I will be a force. SGA will be a change, whether it be big or small. SGA will make a difference. I will make a difference.”
The Vincentian Heritage Tour experience has helped me recognize that while my time as an undergraduate student and President of SGA at DePaul University may be coming to an end, as a Vincentian and human being, I still have plenty of room to grow.
