I’ll be the first to admit the title sounds ridiculous. Funny “bi” puns aside, how can anyone get these two things confused? Hear me out. — The conflict I experienced around my identity led me to a lot of harmful behaviors as a teenager and young adult. Many of those centered around substance use and misuse. I started drinking as a fourteen-year-old, around the time I hit puberty. I had just experienced my first sexual assault…

Our sexuality doesn’t exist in the vacuum — it occupies man-made culture, intersects with multiple parts of self and humanity and colours people’s perception of others. — We all dwell on the intersection(s) of multitude — sexuality is simply one piece of a beautiful puzzle we call life. And there are no templates to living it. In my Bi & Prejudice book I talk a lot about various intersections in my life, including my cultural heritage, white…

It is always changing. — The cool think about sexuality, in my experience, is that it is a spectrum that changes over time. …

I am not talking about kinky bisexuals, because — and this may surprise some people — your sexuality isn’t responsible for your kinkiness or any other lifestyle choices, traits or interests. — I want to talk about all the different ways bisexuals are in the world to give you a better idea of all the possibilities and, hopefully, ignite your desire to learn more and label less. You may remember Fifty Shades of Grey (book and later film), an erotic romance novel…

Far too often bi+ people are mis-labelled based on the sexuality of people they are in relationship with. — No straight or gay people call their relationship(s) bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual or queer. Moreover, many bisexual people often tell me about their straight and/or gay relationship(s) — we embody that what we have been taught. The truth is bisexuality doesn’t morph into hetero- or homo- to align with someone else’s…

Listening to an old song but hearing it in a new way since my bisexual awakening led to a series of realizations about a confusing and painful relationship. — Through therapy, reflection, and my writing, I have been working out some early trauma which resulted in my full-scale bisexual repression by the time I was 16 years old. One thing I keep revisiting is a complicated friendship from junior high. I spent every other weekend over at this friend’s…

Pride Month 2022 is here to celebrate YOU — my beloved queer folks — therefore YOU decide how it all goes down. Or up! — I know that many sensitive people aren’t looking forward to the Pride Month as much as other people may be. Some of us are introverts, navigating challenging time and/or healing. Pride Month 2022 is here to celebrate YOU — my beloved queer folks — therefore YOU decide how it all…

Being Bi+, Partnered, and Clinging to the Wall — As a child, I was certain that any body of water larger than a tub had it in for me. I remember clinging white-knuckled to the side of every pool I found myself forced to enter. Two summers of lessons got me to eventually loosen my grip, to trust in…