THEME OF THE MONTH
Why Men Are Afraid to Be Vulnerable: ‘Patrick Melrose’ (2018)
For some men, honesty and sharing are harder than kicking a drug habit
It only feels right to dedicate a Theme of the Month to “vulnerability” if your publication is called Vulnerable Man. I’m a few months late with this essay, but it’s better now than never. December always makes me emotional, anyway — the snow, the missed holiday meals, the unavoidable nostalgia. So expect some sentimental overflow in the next 30 days.
But first off, I want to talk to you about Patrick Melrose and an old friend of mine.
About fifteen years ago, my dearest high school friend — let’s call him Sam — had an emotional breakdown. He was high and drunk — but I’ve seen him high and drunk dozens of times before, yet never this emotional. He was a big, robust, masculine guy — looked more like a grown man than a teenager.
We were on our way home with a group of friends from a house party. Most of us still half-drunk — slowly sobering up before the summer sun was about to sneak upon us.
Until that day, I’ve never seen Sam weak. He kept his feelings behind an imaginary wall. If anything, I was the sensitive one between the two of us most of the time. Thus I’d been…
