Undo
Black Rock
I can’t unhear it
The macabre, gruesome, horrifying and most unsuitable (12)
I can still hear them
Chattering away
While I sit silently and seethe
Start to boil
Tremble-shake
Hands over my ears
I can’t unhear it
The sounds embedded in my skull
Children’s voices
Shrill shrieks of little demons
Marching like soldiers
Please pay attention
I am suffocating
Struggling to breathe
Heart-race panic-attack
Breathe deeply in and out
All the other kids
In the schoolbus
Can’t see it
It’s only me
That can feel it sense it
The looming Presence
They don’t notice
There’s something wrong with me
Shake-tremble
I want to be alone
I feel so much better then
That’s what I’ve always wanted
I force myself to calm down
I look around me and smile
Imagining how I would
Silence them
Tear out their little throats
Even back then
A gradual darkening mind fading light
Diminished responsibility
Lack of remorse
I am always honest
You don’t always want to
Hear the truth
I will make you listen
You took my freedom
Once upon a time
In the little town
Of my childhood
Full of black rocks
And dusty streets
A garden once majestic
Vibrant full of life
You took my childhood
From me my joy
You taught me how to behave
Now the student is surpassing
The master
I taught myself to live
On purpose
To create my own joy
You made a crucial mistake
You should have done it
To a stranger
Not someone you knew
So intimately
You are going to get old one day
Defenseless like I was
I will bide my time
I will let you live for now
While I plan it all out
I can’t hardly wait
Personal Note:
I use to get panic attacks as a kid. My throat would constrict, my eyes would start to water, I would wheeze and be unable to breathe, my hands would shake and I would start drooling. The only thing that alleviated the symptoms was counting. I would count to a hundred and then back to zero, then up again, until I felt better. Sometimes it took a very long time. I found that, if I stayed in my head at least for a little while, I would be able to cope.
Dumelang bohle!!! African Greetings!!! Please support me so I can continue to do what makes my spirit feel alive and feeds my soul; and that is to express myself through words and photos every day.
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I do not currently qualify for the Medium Partner Program due to country location; South Africa.
