Day 7 in The Ozarks
The True Impact of Getting Picked Last at Dodgeball as a Kid
Gunther Fredriksson’s Nobel Prize medallion glinted in the brilliant sunlight streaming through the open window. He’d won it in 2016 for his remarkable contributions on molecular genome dynamics. It was some pretty complex stuff, and had taken him eons to figure out; but the ramifications of it meant a lot to a small group of people. At his home deep in the Ozark mountains, he was having absolutely no trouble practicing social distancing. In fact, he never had in his life.
His family had come to America from Europe when he was just ten years old, and even back then he knew that he wasn’t like any of the other kids. He excelled in school, he always finished his homework on time and he could repair almost any appliance in the house.
But he didn’t really have any friends. Not real friends anyway, mostly just other kids that wanted help getting a passing grade. In fact all the way through his educational years right in to his career, people avoided him. Many found him boring, others just had no time for his relentless science talk. He knew deep inside that he was interesting, it was just that people were too dumb to understand him.
He is feeling pretty vindicated at this very moment.
Gunther smiled as he got up to make himself a cup of tea. Tea is his favorite drink. He had a collection of some of the rarest varieties in the world. He thought that maybe later he’d read a book or do some calculations. Perhaps he might even wash his windows. Although times were strange for most of the planet, for Gunther, this was just another day. He smiled again.
When the virus first made the head lines, the leaders of almost every nation called upon their brilliant scientists for a bit of guidance. They needed some direction. They needed answers. Gunther was thrilled that he had been contacted. Since that big day in 2016, he hadn’t been feeling very important.
In fact, even on the day that he’d been awarded the prize, the ‘celebration’ had consisted of himself and two other scientists. Neither of them ever got out that much either. Truth be told, he was a bit lonely and he hated the fact that normal people found socializing so easy.
So when the call came, the ring of the phone so rare that it startled the shit out of him, he was thrilled that he might be of some assistance. He listened very carefully. In his mind he was running 100 simulations at the same time. He asked a lot of questions, although that was mostly because he was happy to be hearing another voice and did not want the call to end.
*********
Alex Mack had worked for the state department for nearly 7 years. He had a wife and two kids whom he adored. He and his wife still had a date night every week. They had sex regularly. Without fail, he went out with his work colleagues every Friday after work. He was also a massive germaphobe. He loved his very social life, but he was suddenly afraid of everyone. He knew that a scientist would have the answers.
“So, what shall we do? Can you people make a vaccine?” Said the man from the state department.
“I’ll have to consult my fellow academics, but a vaccine could take years” Gunther replied.
In truth he’d already had some ideas about what should be done, if anything, but he wanted an excuse to call back.
“I’ll call you tomorrow,” Gunther said, jotting the number down.
He hung up the phone and stared at the unit. He honestly could not remember when the last time he had used it was. He opened his little notebook with the numbers of fellow scientists. At first he hesitated, as he was not used to using the device. Then he picked up the receiver and dialed. He called Arthur Taylor, who lived in California. After half a dozen rings, Arthur finally picked up.
“What?” Arthur said. He too, was not used to phone calls.
“Hey Arthur, it’s Gunther. How are you?”
Arthur had been instrumental in Gunther’s research. His modeling of the mechanisms involved in the changing and maintenance of genomes was integral to Gunther’s work. He was in fact thanked profusely durning the acceptance speech and was also one of the two attendees for the subsequent celebration.
“Oh hello my friend, I’m ok” Arthur replied, “I suppose that you’ve been getting quite a few calls from the government?”
Gunther was happy that Arthur had used the word ‘friend’. He did not hear it all that often.
“Yes, I have” Gunther said, a little miffed that’d received only one call, not ‘quite a few calls’ as it seemed Arthur had.
“What do you think?” Arthur asked.
“Well, from the projections that I’ve done quickly in my head, I can see that it might be pretty hard on the over 60s, the unhealthy and those with poor nutrition, but I don’t see it being too bad. It’s a strain of super-flu really. A particularly bad one. I think that the fact that there is no vaccination will probably freak out some people.”
“That is the very same conclusion I came to” Arthur replied, “but I spent a few hours doing projections.”
Obviously they had called him first, which Gunther found particularly annoying.
“But that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t recommend that people stay home and stay well away from each other.”
“Agreed, Gunther, perhaps a bit drastic, but nothing different that what we do every day of our lives, so what’s the big deal, right?” Arthur replied.
Gunther winced a little, hearing the truth of his life laid out so plainly. He had always been the last one picked for sport, he always stood alone at cocktail parties and a girlfriend had been nothing more than a fantasy.
“Yes, you are right” Gunther admitted with a twinge of sadness, “we should recommend that. Maybe then people will understand our lives. And for us it will be easy.”
“I have spoken to a few of our colleagues and we have all agreed that might be the best way forward. Perhaps get in touch with others that you know and let’s get a consensus” Arthur said.
“Yes Arthur, and we’ll get a big university to back us up, too. But how on earth would we convince people of that? Even my most basic research shows that humans are a disgustingly social lot.”
“Create a panic” Arthur said, “make it sound worse than it is. I’m already on Social media spreading my version.”
“Is that ethical?” Gunther asked.
“Seriously? Look how we have been treated. And what’s the big deal? They won’t even notice.”
“Maybe you are right Arthur, maybe they need a taste of what it’s like. At worst it will slow the spread.”
And so, that afternoon, a web of phone calls and emails spread out across the globe creating a concurrence in regards as how to not only halt the spread but also make all of the normal people feel a bit of isolation. In only a matter of hours, the unanimity was complete. Very few voices of dissent were heard. How to make loneliness the new norm was agreed upon. It was decided that Gunther should deliver the verdict, as he was a respected recipient of the coveted award.
*******
“Thank god you returned my call” the man from the government said when Gunther rang him, “what the hell should we do?”
“I have spoken to many of my colleagues” Gunther said.
“And?”
“And we believe it’s best that everyone just goes home alone right now. No taxi sharing. No Uber-x. People need to stay at least six feet apart. It would be even better if they stayed apart at home too. No kissing, no hugs and no sex.”
“Sounds pretty drastic” Alex replied. He didn’t want to avoid his wife and kids, but neither did he want to get infected. He’d seen the TV shows. He’d seen the movies. He did not want to become a zombie.
“Really?” Gunther said, “You dare question the largest group of scientists ever gathered?”
“It’s just that it seems…” his voice trailed off, visions of the zombie apocalypse filling his head.
“Just what? Ask anyone” Gunther said forcefully, “you could save millions, billions, trillions of lives.”
“This is unanimous then?” Alex replied, wondering if there were even a trillion people on the planet.
“Of course it is” Gunther said.
Gunther knew that most of the stats that he was giving were far and away the ‘worst case’ scenarios, probably a little over the top, but the community had decided that it was time for a universal payback for being excluded from the ‘cool kids’ club. Besides, they wouldn’t even notice.
“Well, I suppose that if you all agree” Alex said, “I’ll make the recommendation.”
He thanked Gunther, telling him to stay safe and take care. Then, being a government official who rarely trusts anyone, phoned a dozen other respected scientists. The answer was the same everywhere. Some added dire warnings designed to invoke a panic. Others were more relaxed but still said that everyone should be alone. One even used the word lonely before correcting himself.
And so, a week in to the enforced isolation, people were starting to go a bit batty. But for the scientific community that had recommended it, it was just another day.
A #wallcrazyfiction story written in isolation.
Stay tuned. https://medium.com/wall-crazy-fiction
