The Label Says — She Is A Slut

Society has placed a measurement tape on Sluthood

Stephen
Waterybeans
3 min readFeb 19, 2020

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Photo by Meg on Unsplash

According to the very infamous Google Search, A Slut is a woman who has many casual sexual partners, and also a woman with low standards of cleanliness.

Who is a Slut? What is now the right amount of casual sex partners, and how does that define your worth and virtue?

Society has placed a measurement tape on Sluthood, but the same society forgot that the measurement tape has no numbers or values to display valid results. How can you label someone a slut simply because she doesn’t feel ashamed of how many partners she has been intimate with. So are you against the act itself or you’re just spiteful against people that “own it”.

Honestly, if we are to scrutinize everyone in the world with an actual sluthood measuring tape then I really don’t think there will be many left without the “slut-label”. How can a definition “slut” which fuels from gender discrimination filled with so much hypocrisy be adopted as an actual word that classifies a group of people and their way of life?

Before we slut shame others can’t we at least search ourselves and ask some very realistic questions:

Don’t I feel turned on sometimes or horny?

Don’t I lust over someone or at least desire someone once in a while?

Is having a one night stand bad?

Does a one night stand make me a Slut?

Am I a Virgin?

Does my Virginity add any extra value to my personal growth?

Am I truly a Virgin because I chose to or is it because society wants me to be?

Do I hide my feelings under my virginity or do I just pretend like I don’t desire sex and I am immune to its desire?

Do I even know what being sexual entails?

Am I still trying to discover my sexuality?

Trust me, when you answer these questions sincerely, you will find out that most people’s definition of a slut is very personal, selfish, ignorant, judgmental and insecure.

Now, I am not saying you should be promiscuous and just give the cookie to anyone at anytime at anyplace, of course not, everyone should possess some degree of dignity when it comes to exploring their human sexuality and there should be a way people that restrain themselves as a result of their respect and value of humanity in sexuality should be revered or at least exonerated.

But at the same time, we humans have to realize that everybody is different and definitely have their own special ways of expressing and resonating with their sexuality. Because someone chooses to act on their feelings doesn’t make them of less value than you are or deserve less respect.

A lot of people back in my country, Nigeria, equate virginity with sexual maturity and good decision making, but in the end find out that the colour of your hair or your hairstyle doesn’t add any extra score to your IQ.

If virginity is your choice then great, you have your reasons and that is duly respected, but when society is dictating to you how you should express your desires and for some people, whether or when they should go celibate or not then I don’t think that’s a great idea.

If you can confidently tag someone as a slut, someone whom you just heard rumours about, without even trying to get to know the person to an extent, then your brain might probably be the only actual confident slut in the room.

Nobody is perfect, and a lot of unconscious prejudice will still happen around us and from us, we are flawed and we will always have that weakness as humans, but the strength in us will always come when we genuinely keep trying to treat others well, include others into our scope of view and cut of labels of prejudice.

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Stephen
Waterybeans

Confused soul. I’m all about everything progressive. Reach out — stephenfresh150@gmail.com