Emotional Intelligence or EQ happens to be the strongest predictor of long-term success. Surprisingly, it can be quite easily developed!

This was Shivani Subudhi’s announcement when she entered the WaveMakers ecosystem. Shivani is not a WaveMakers alumna, but a certified life coach who devotes her time to helping individuals as emotionally intelligent humans. So we could not NOT ask her to join our session!

Shivani shared some of her Emotional intelligence (EI) wisdom with us, the ability to perceive, use, understand, manage, and handle emotions. The concept includes five different pillars that aren’t inherently present or not but can be trained and developed over time: Self-awareness, managing emotions, motivating oneself, empathy, social skill.

We took a deeper look at the concept of „Empathy“ and Shivani shared two common empathy-related mistakes with us:

1. The golden rule you learned is wrong. Oops.

Were you also taught the famous „Do unto others the way you would have them do unto you.“? While your parents or teachers probably had the best intentions and wanted to promote empathy, they did not get it exactly right.

Shivani taught us to consider this variation of the golden rule: „Determine what others would want done unto them and do that.“ Contrary to the original version, the new statement recognizes the fact that all humans are different. Don’t assume that others have the same wants and needs as you, but ask them! For example:

• Would you like to talk about it?
• Do you need your space?

2. Healthy empathy means not giving away your power.

Remember that emotions are your choice! Negative feelings are caused by negative thoughts and you can steer the direction of your thoughts. This is especially important when you face dominant personalities and have a hard time distancing yourself from their emotions.

Shivani advised practicing the art of choosing NOT to allow yourself to be so strongly impacted by others’ negative emotions. Set boundaries and be mindful about the direction of your thoughts.

Want to learn more about Emotional Intelligence? Shivani recommended this Emotional Intelligence Test by Psychology Today for a headstart into the topic: https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/tests/personality/emotional-intelligence-test

And, as always, follow WaveMakers on LinkedIn and Instagram for more interesting content around leadership and self-empowerment!