What does Demi Lovato have in common with others affected by drug use?
Look beyond the celebrity and the singer’s traumatic childhood is very similar to many of the people I support
By Adrian Riley, Team Leader at With You in North Somerset
On the surface, Demi Lovato’s story is a classic Hollywood tale. A child star who struggled growing up in the glare of the spotlight, she started using drugs as a way to cope, culminating in her much reported overdose in 2018.
A new four part documentary series released today explores the lead up and aftermath of Lovato’s overdose. While many people will struggle to identify with the exposure and stress of fame, not knowing what it’s like to be hounded by paparazzi or having your personal life splashed across the front pages doesn’t mean you can’t identify with Lovato’s story. I work at With You, a charity supporting people with issues around drugs and alcohol in North Somerset. While the people we support haven’t released platinum albums or judged the American X-Factor, their childhood’s are often surprisingly similar to Lovato’s.
Lovato has talked openly how her Father’s addictions and “abusive” personality led her to drugs as he chose them over his family. She also recently disclosed that she was sexually assaulted as a teenager. Having a parent with a drug or alcohol problem or experiencing sexual abuse are two examples of many traumas a child can go through. In the sector we refer to these as Adverse Childhood Experiences. These could be sexual or physical abuse, parental abandonment or witnessing domestic violence. In some instances it’s having a parent go to prison, struggle with mental health issues or emotional neglect. Often people experience more than one at once. Across the UK around 12% of people experience four or more whilst growing up. Of the people we support in North Somerset it’s over 60%.
A recent study by the British Medical Journal found people who’ve experienced childhood trauma are twice as likely to develop a mental health condition. For people struggling to deal with emotional pain, drugs like heroin or cocaine can offer brief but really powerful relief. I see every day the good and resilient nature of the people I support. That’s why it’s so painful to regularly see people who have an issue with drugs derided by newspapers as ‘junkies’ or ‘criminals’, their whole identity reduced to lazy stereotypes without any reflection on how their past has shaped them.
In my experience, mental health services don’t support people who admit to having a drug issue as it’s judged the mind altering power of drugs prevent people from making progress. But the source of people’s psychological pain must be addressed to help lessen the grip drugs have on them, otherwise you are just putting a sticking plaster on a major wound.
As a counsellor you realise people’s problems lie in relationships rather than a particular substance. Often children who grow up around dysfunctional relationships enter into similar situations as an adult because it’s all they know, while people who have suffered abuse as a child often internalise a sense of guilt and shame that manifests in issues like depression.
That’s why when we work with someone we don’t concentrate on the drug in question. Instead, we get to know the person, what are their relationships like? What do they want to achieve? What’s holding them back? Often they still see past incidents through a child’s eyes so it’s about creating a non-judgemental space where they can process what happened to them with an adult perspective.
This kind of mental health support as an approach to recovery really works. I recently supported a woman whose childhood had been marred by domestic abuse and then ended up in a violent relationship herself. She used drugs as a way to escape from the hurt she’d experienced. But, after seven months of counselling, the drugs no longer had the same hold on her. Her past relationships had always been dominant, with little space to reflect or realise that what had happened to her wasn’t a reflection of who she was.
But I’m lucky. Through a good relationship with the local university, the service I work in is able to provide counsellors to support the people we work with. In other areas, stretched budgets mean this is not the case. As part one of the recent Dame Carol Black Review into drugs and drug treatment said, “a prolonged shortage of funding has resulted in a loss of skills, expertise and capacity from this sector.” This means many services see the same people coming in and out of their doors in a cycle, the sticking plaster soon peeling off. The government’s recent announcement of a funding boost for drug treatment is welcome, but more needs to be done to address the relationship between trauma and drug use. Making sure all drug and alcohol services have the resources to employ specialist mental health staff would be a great start.
Demi Lovato still visits a therapist twice a week. But this kind of long-term mental health support shouldn’t just be available to those who can pay. Without tending to the old wounds that drive people’s drug use, it’s very hard for them to properly heal.
These are tough times for everyone. With You services are open and we’re here to work alongside you during this difficult time. Visit our website for information and advice, to chat to a trained advisor or to find your local service.
