The Painful Duty of Genius
One of my favorite books of all time is named the Duty of Genius and was about Ludwig Wittgenstein. The book tells the story of one of the greatest thinkers of all time in a biographical type way. It conveys his life and gives us a glimpse into the workings of his beautiful mind.
There are movies about this stuff too. Namesakes about great mathematicians and such who just can’t relate to everyday life show us what it must be like to be on a whole different level and therefore unable to or barely able to live.
Tonight we finished a book club on David Foster Wallace’s greatest work called Infinite Jest. The 1,000 page book was a heft to read and took months for our group to complete. As someone who reads Hegel for fun, I don’t take it lightly to say this was a challenge. But boy was it worth it. The complexity, rigour and texture of the book was only surpassed by the depth, richness and subtlety of the insights each character illuminated about our everyday lives. These normal but somehow complex and darker versions of humanity highlighted the struggles of life. Of parenthood, childhood, relationships, existence, politics, commercialism, substance abuse and more.
Sadly, DFW himself committed suicide in 2008, at the young age of 46 only 12 years after creating this great work which grappled with issues of depression and the hardships of life.
I’m not saying I understand why such a genius as David Foster Wallace, or anyone for that matter, would commit suicide. But his book conveys more powerfully than anything I’ve read before just how hard and yet at the same time nuanced and complex life can sometimes be.
The reality is it likely is harder for those with a higher sensitivity, whether that be intellectual or emotional to live and experience the everyday. They feel the nuances more deeply and therefore are likely more impacted by them.
Even Wittgenstein apparently grappled with suicide, and many other extraordinary people have committed suicide including Cleopatra, Kurt Cobain, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh and so many others.
The painful beautiful truth of books like Infinite Jest and Duty of Genius and so many more is that the intensity and depth of life, while heartbreakingly inspiring in its complexity and gravity is also sometimes just damn hard for people to process and live through. And that sometimes the genius that allows folks to appreciate the subtlety and the sensitivity to feel the complexity opens up the heart to the pain and heartache of navigating through the volatility of what isn’t always the straight and narrow.
From my vantage point, despite the pain and hardship that comes with the reality of a complex narrative of our existence, the beauty and gifts are the main thing. Even when reading about the struggles of the different aspects of life DFW shares through characters grappling with abuse, addiction and worse, there is the promise of a path beyond these low points. A higher power, calling and even the simple blessings of an everyday life.
And yet, it is not my place to judge those who succumb to the painful reality that is the heartache that so many feel in what it is to be alive and aware. That so many struggle, sometimes silently and alone, is a reality and the stories these authors tell simply highlight a common reality shared by many of various walks of life.
Perhaps I’m treading on thin ice by raising these topics and maybe I’m only half sharing my own personal connection with these realities because of the difficulty of such topics. But I’m guessing that is ok. Mainly, I’m just grateful that you are reading this and that I was able to share in the genius that David Foster Wallace gave us before he left this earth.
Maybe in that way the afterlife is a very clear and obvious thing here beyond his time. His star is present here and now, radiating through our memories of him. Like the far too many who have similarly gone before their time, they live on forever through their stories, memories and simple moments projected through the energy of their time here with us.
