Conversation with My Wife (196)

Why yes, we DO plan to go cruising with the Anti-Christ! Why do you ask?

We had booked an Alaska cruise for our 20th anniversary in 2020. Then rebooked for 2021 when 2020 got cancelled. And have re-rebooked for 2022 because Canada still isn’t letting us in. So we’re watching cruise-related news.

ME: So Florida is suing the CDC to stop the rules that cruise lines have to follow before they can start taking on passengers from American ports. Or, more specifically from Florida’s point of view, Florida cruise terminals in Miami and Fort Lauderdale and other parts of the state.

DEB: That’s got to be millions of tourist dollars—

ME: Billions, it says here.

DEB: Okay, a lot of money. So I can see Florida’s point of view. What are they suggesting the CDC do instead?

ME: Uhhh… from what I’m reading here, they want the CDC to just shut up and let people go on board.

DEB: Well, that’s stupid!

ME: Oh, it gets better. Apparently the governor won’t allow cruise lines to ask potential passengers about their vaccination status.

DEB: What?

ME: Yeah. I don’t think we’ll be going on a cruise out of a Florida port any time soon, honey.

DEB: Since there are no cruises that I know of leaving from Fort Lauderdale to Alaska, I don’t see that as a problem, Jackster.

ME: I thought you loved being on that Caribbean beach when we went cruising for our tenth anniversary?

Deb, wading in the water at the port stop at Grand Turk, March 2010. She’s holding two sets of shoes because I needed both hands to work the camera. (photo by author, obviously)

DEB: Yes. In March. Dead of winter, almost. Anyway, I’m fine waiting until everyone can get their COVID shot and can prove it.

ME: It turns out that some are saying that vaccination cards are the mark of the beast.

DEB: Is there a “666” on ours somewhere? How do they come up with that?

ME: Um, I think they skipped the number part and just went for the part where the mark is needed for commerce. Something like that.¹

DEB: Well, we’ll be leaving out of Vancouver, BC, and the Canadians won’t be doing anything stupid.

ME: I think we both trust Canada more than we trust Florida.

¹Revelations 13:16–17: “And the second beast required all people small and great, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hand or on their forehead, so that no one could buy or sell unless he had the mark — the name of the beast or the number of its name.”

Copyright ©2021 by Jack Herlocker. All rights reserved, and there shall be great wailing and lamentations and gnashing of teeth in outer darkness—I have no idea how to do that, but I’m sure there’s a YouTube video—if you steal this.



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