Trill Talk: Markian
Youtube sensation Markian Benhamou takes a stand on mental health & the challenges of social media.
Q: Here at Trill we like to keep it True and Real, so give us the scoop, Markian. Who are you?
A: I’m a shy kid. I am the goofy older brother that’s how I describe myself but if you were to look at me online, I do comedy skits and my mission is to make people smile. I would say positive and optimistic are also words and that I describe myself. I grew up in Russia, Spain, and Hong Kong so I have a cultural background that is International.
Q: What does self-love mean to you?
A: My journey of self-reflection and self-awareness really started when I was around 14 or 15. I used to be super shy and I want to be like my more extroverted best friends and that’s when I really had to be aware of how I behave and how others behave and copy how my extroverted friends behave. That led me to a journey that I’m still on but I’ve changed a lot in terms of my behavior. Working on emotional intelligence and self-confidence is also a huge super important skill to have for me. I had a memorable moment when I climbed Mount Kilimanjaro when I was fifteen which was kind of like that a big achievement that I can stay like I could do anything you know if I have climbed Mount Kilimanjaro I can do anything.
So self- love means working on yourself, being aware of your strengths and weaknesses, always trying to improve yourself and I think a big part of how to do that is to leave your comfort zone.
A: The moments that shaped me the most were the ones I had to leave my comfort zone. I think making videos is a great reason to leave my comfort zone. For example, I made a video in Hong Kong giving flowers to girls on Valentine’s Day even though I’ve never approached strangers or done anything like this. This was a huge step outside of my comfort zone but that’s really what helped me build confidence over rejection or knowing what my value is in putting myself out there and into a weird situation like that.
Q: How do you motivate yourself to get out of your comfort zone even though you are shy?
A: My personal pep talk in my head is kind of like “Yeah, you got this. Nobody can stop you” as if I’m preparing for a hundred-meter sprint or an Olympic event, and I think you can take small steps to leave your comfort zone first. Ask the stranger for the time, then you ask a stranger for a free dessert at a restaurant or at Starbucks, and then ask someone for their number, so you can build up your confidence.
Q: Why does mental health matter to you; what does your own self-care routine look like, especially now during quarantine?
A: Mental health is so important because it’s what’s going on in your mind every day. That is going to be with you for the rest of your life. I read a quote that went like “you spend most of your day in your head, make sure it’s a good place” and it’s a lifelong journey to improving yourself. It’s not like once I have good mental health, then “I’m good.”
The way I typically work on my routine for mental health is exercising in the mornings and getting good sleep. I think people undervalue how important sleep is. Getting 7 to 8 hours changed the game for me personally. I don’t drink coffee, I don’t drink energy drinks so sleep is my energy source. Exercise is also really important. Meditating was actually a really cool activity that I kind of do on and off but surprisingly works really well every time I do it so I would recommend it.
Q: You have mentioned that you are a bit of an introvert. How do you balance your introverted personality with social media’s culture of extroversion?
A: I think limiting social media is really important. If I wasn’t doing social media as a business, I wouldn’t really be on it, especially not posting. That’s a thing that’s just not me. Disconnecting yourself from social media, from your phone it’s important. Anytime I’m with someone, I never use my phone but when I’m alone, it’s in my blood to just check social media every 5 seconds. It probably isn’t healthy, so I think I have a good separation of work and personal life by limiting social media.
Q: Being introverted, working full time on social media must be strange, right?
A: Yeah, but it’s fulfilling because I have a purpose and I know why I’m doing it rather than just like “Hey! Look at my life!”, it’s more like I want to inspire people to smile and here’s positive, wholesome content. I’m achieving that so it’s always with an intention rather than “I’m bored, let me just take an Instagram story.”
Q: how do you recommend people make others smile in their daily life?
A: Simple: live life with a smile. Even more than that, it’s living life with a positive attitude and happiness. You can argue that happiness is a choice and it’s just about how you view things, your perspectives being an optimist versus being a pessimist (nobody wants to be around a pessimist). Smiling is a simple vehicle to achieve that greater mission. It’s such a powerful small act that can break down barriers, and help you connect people. It’s the most natural expression of happiness.
Q: How would you encourage others to find their happiness and be less lonely?
A: I would say first with topics related to depression or anxiety, I’m not an expert in it and I’m sure there are other health conditions that I don’t know much about. But for the generic person who feels a little sad or lonely, try to leave your comfort zone. Push yourself to join new groups, join new communities, try new activities, and always approach new situations with a smile. Whenever you walk into a room, it’ll just help you connect with people better and that will in turn trigger your own brain’s endorphins, those happy feelings because it triggers your brain that you’re smiling.
Q: One thing we noticed about your social media is how willing you were to be an accessible figure (inviting people to message your DMs, asking questions, etc.). Were there any special instances where someone reached out to you? How do you manage that role you’ve given yourself on social media?
A: I think the good thing about having a positive brand is that it’s the same as who I am in person. I don’t have to fake anything or lie to be someone that I’m not on camera then change so I’m just naturally that kind of person. As long as I am myself, I know that I’ll do well and I have a good moral compass.
A funny experience that I’ve had, I’ve actually made a video about this on my Instagram. One day, I received a letter in the mail and it was written by a kid and it said “hey Markian! I’m a big fan. I’d like to invite you to our Superbowl party.” They actually live in the same complex that I live in and they were like “Here is my address. Come by.” I ended up going and they were super excited and there were like a bunch of 10 years olds and it was really nice, they were excited to see me. I just like giving back. I like doing these kinds of things and just living life with kindness. It’s just a nice thing to do so I don’t mind doing that.
Q: What was the toughest question you had to answer on the Internet? How did you deal with it?
A: We can talk about current events. George Floyd’s death was tough but I ended up making a video just to share my thoughts and showing my support as I thought it was the right thing to do. It wasn’t necessarily a political issue because I generally don’t speak about politics or any serious topics but I still thought it was the right thing to do so that was like a conflictual moment. The reception was really positive and I think it was the right thing to do.
Q: Anything you would like to say to the Trill community?
A: I would say we covered a lot of cool talking points such as leaving your comfort zone, trying new things because there’s always a great experience on the other side, meeting new people and it can be as simple as either joining a community or talking to strangers. I met some of the most interesting people in LA by approaching a stranger because that means that they’re out of my usual bubbles or circles. Most people that I know are part of circles whether it’s college or being a Creator and so you don’t meet too many different people but I’ve met some really interesting people approaching strangers. Lastly, being positive and smiling and I think good things come when you put out good energy and you’re kind. I think my favorite quote that represents that is “smile and the world will smile back.”
Q: Where can we find out more about Markian? How can we support you and your work?
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