5 Insights that Helped Me Reach My Goals
Stop procrastinating and start acting!
It’s fun to set goals. When you set goals, you take time to envision how great life will be in the future. Your business is thriving, you’re jet setting across the world, and you’ve been nominated for an Academy Award (or a Pulitzer Prize). When you first set goals, it feels good because you believe you will achieve them. You get to dream as big as you want. You feel inspired, motivated, and full of potential.
It’s for this very reason I spend more time setting goals than actively working toward them.
When you are actively working toward a goal, you’ll inevitably experience setbacks and bumps in the road that will test your resolve. It takes hard work to achieve an ambitious goal, and many — including myself — give up before getting to taste success.
To experience the goal-setting high, I write my goals down and revise them ad nauseum.
I have zero artistic ability, so I stay away from things like bullet journals. My preference is to simply write endless lists of all the things I want to accomplish in one of those fancy Moleskin journals. I even go so far as to write out the specific steps that I’ll need to take to achieve them. And, yes, I do have a vision board hanging in my office. Spoiler alert: vision boards do not make things magically happen. But that’s about as far as I’ve gotten with many of my big goals.
When I do act on a goal, I find that the fire in me quickly burns out. It’s not because I lack the desire to achieve my goals; I just give up too easily if I don’t see immediate results.
But I’ve made a promise to myself — an early New Year’s resolution. I’m going to stop giving up on my goals! I’m going to stop making excuses, stop procrastinating, and stop not believing in myself.
I turned 40 earlier this year. I wouldn’t say I’m having a mid-life crisis per se. Maybe I am. Whatever you want to call it, turning 40 has made me realize it’s time to stop wasting time. It helps that I’m starting to care a little less about what people think. Failing doesn’t seem so scary anymore. Not trying at all — that’s terrifying.
Below are five realizations I’ve made that are helping me to act on my goals — finally!
1. I’m Setting SMART Goals.
That is, Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. If you haven’t already heard of SMART goals, I suggest reading more about this type of goal setting here.
It’s crucial to set goals that meet these five criteria, so they are clear and attainable. Not setting goals the SMART way might leave you confused and unsure of how to begin.
For example, a SMART goal would not be: “I want to attain financial freedom.” Believe it or not, that’s way too vague.
If your goal is to have financial freedom, you must be more specific. What does “financial freedom” mean to you? Is it not having to work, owning a bunch of houses, and being able to travel the world? Or, is it simply to pay off all your debt?
Then consider how you’ll determine if you’re making progress toward financial freedom? For example, paying off credit card debt and student loans might be some ways that you measure this goal.
Is your goal achievable? Be realistic. If you’re 85-years-old, owe $1 million in debt, and solely live off Social Security, a goal of complete financial freedom is probably not practical.
Does your goal really matter to you? As I mentioned, you will need to get clear on what you want. If you’re going to put a lot of effort toward achieving a goal, it must be relevant to the bigger picture of your happiness.
Finally, your goal needs to have a timeline. Setting specific deadlines will motivate you and hold you accountable. Otherwise, you’ll find it easy to keep putting off the hard work.
Here is an example of a SMART goal:
“I will achieve financial freedom, which means no longer having debt that causes me to worry (specific and relevant). To accomplish this goal, I will pay $100 a month toward credit card debt for the next 12 months, and $400 a month toward student loans over the next 3 years (measurable). I will achieve this by asking for a raise at work, cutting back on discretionary spending by 50%, and selling items with financial value that I no longer need (attainable). I will achieve financial freedom in three years (time-bound).”
Yes, it looks like a lot to write for one goal, but being this specific will make you really think about what you need to do to achieve that goal. After all, if you can’t put effort into detailing the specifics, how much effort will you put into actually working toward your goal?
So, go ahead and get crystal clear on your goals and how you plan to achieve them. You can list them in the Notes app on your iPhone, use hieroglyphics in Bullet Journals, or make a vision board — whatever inspires you — just get the goals down and be as specific as you can be.
2. I’m Going to Stop Being Afraid, Stop Making Excuses, and Start Acting!
I’ve wasted many years in jobs that I hated and bored the daylights out of me. Yes, I did gain a lot of useful skills, and I’m grateful for the references, but if I could turn back the clock, I would’ve left to pursue my passions.
Why didn’t I? It wasn’t because I had bills and a mortgage that needed to be paid (though I did). The real reason was that I was too afraid and didn’t believe I would succeed.
Now, I know you’re thinking: Well, I certainly can’t just quit my job! I have a mortgage and kids and responsibilities!!
I get it. I’m not saying to quit your job if it will result in your house going into foreclosure or your kids going hungry. What I am saying is, don’t be afraid to take a risk if an opportunity presents itself.
If you’ve been running a candle-making business on the side for the past year, and you’re sure you could bring in more revenue if you only had more time to devote to it, then take the chance on yourself. Barring another recession (which I realize is a real possibility these days), you will find another tedious desk job if you need to — I promise.
Once you’ve set your SMART goals, it’s time to start acting! Stop saying that you’re too busy, you don’t have the money right now, or you have to this and that before you can start taking steps toward your goal.
If you’re not acting in some concrete way, you’re making excuses. And if you’re always making excuses, you need to figure out why so you can stop letting them impede your success.
I jokingly call myself a “recovering procrastinator.” However, I don’t believe people are inherently procrastinators. There’s usually a reason behind a lack of motivation and tendency to put things off. My advice is to try to understand what’s holding you back. You can do this by paying attention to the words that go through your mind when you think about your goals.
Here are some possible reasons to ponder:
· You’re paralyzed by the need to be perfect.
· You’re afraid of failing.
· You’re afraid of succeeding.
· The goal you set isn’t what you truly want.
· You’re not clear on your goals.
· You haven’t planned out how you’ll deal with setbacks.
There is a long list of possible reasons that are holding you back from achieving your goals. The point is, you need to figure out what’s blocking you. For me, it was mostly the fear of failure. Once I figured out how to stop this fear from holding me back, I started to make progress toward my goals. It’s now so much less scary since I took that first step.
3. I Won’t Burn Myself Out.
If you want to achieve your goal, you must put in hard work. There’s no way around it. I’ve read tons of books written by successful entrepreneurs, and the one thing they all preach — you must work your ass off and make your goal a priority.
That being said, there is such a thing as being too extreme. If you’re sacrificing your health, it’s time to slow down.
I’m the type of person who will eat, sleep, and breath something I set my mind to. I’ll get so absorbed by it there are times I forget to eat and barely get sleep. I’ll find myself up at all hours of the night working or obsessing over work. While I would get a lot done this way, I’d end up feeling sick and burnt out after a while. When this happens, especially if I’m not yet seeing results, I’d lose all motivation. I’d be so exhausted and feel so sick, it didn’t seem worth all the effort.
It’s crucial to pace yourself when striving toward a long-term goal. Pacing yourself protects you from getting burnt out before you’ve reached your objective.
Make sure to get good sleep, eat healthy foods (limit sugar), drink lots of water (and less caffeine), exercise at least a few times a week, and take breaks when needed. Basically, live a healthy lifestyle. Also, don’t forget to spend time with loved ones who can support and motivate you when you need it.
As I work toward my goals, I make sure I no longer spend my nights obsessively plotting my future. Instead, I read a book while in bed, which occupies my mind and tends to make me sleepy. I’m also making a point to exercise, do yoga, and spend time with my husband and dog. These are the things that relax me and put me in the right mindset, so I can be as productive as possible when I work toward my goals. After all, it would be nice to live long enough to enjoy the fruits of my labor.
4. It’s Not Too Late.
Since turning 40, I’ve had to convince myself that I’m not too old to change my life course and set new goals. For me, this meant making a big career change.
I’d been unhappy in my career for a while, but I kept telling myself that I’m too old to start over. I’d think: No one is going to want to hire a 40-something person without experience in this field. However, the idea of spending another twenty-five years in a career I hate gave me enough incentive to take the leap.
Since starting on a new career path, I’ve come to realize that my worth as an employee is not tied to my age. It relates to my ability to have an open mind, to always want to learn, to advocate for my clients, and to keep my commitments and be reliable. People are so much more than their age.
If you think you’re too old (or too young) to set big goals and achieve whatever it is you want in life, you’re not. Being in a graduate program has shown me this truth. There are students of different ages in my master’s program, and they all bring value to the classroom and the profession.
Working toward a goal keeps everyone young because it gives you real purpose. Also, it keeps life interesting.
5. I’m in it for the Long Haul.
I admit that I’m a person who needs instant gratification. Well, maybe not instant, but I do tend to lose motivation if I don’t see results soon after I start something. But I’ve realized that anything worth achieving requires commitment, even if you don’t see results right away.
If you find that you give up too quickly, it helps to get clear on what motivates you to keep striving toward your goal.
Luckily, we are often motivated by many things — it’s a good thing because sometimes what motivates us isn’t always at our disposal.
For example, if you’re a person who is motivated by money, but the money isn’t coming in, you’ll need to come up with some other incentive to keep that fire burning. Perhaps it’s your children that motivate you. When the money isn’t rolling in, remind yourself that your children will benefit if you keep up the hard work and stay on track toward achieving your goal.
I’ve learned that I’m motivated by seeing results and getting feedback. However, some of my goals don’t lend themselves to immediate results and feedback. In the absence of this, I’m motivated by the feeling that I’m doing something worthwhile. Fortunately, many of my goals allow me to feel like I’m making a difference almost immediately. Going forward, whenever I start to feel discouraged by a lack of results, I’m going to remind myself that what I’m doing is making a difference.
I’m proud to say that, in a short amount of time, I’ve made more progress with my goals than I have in years. I believe I owe this success to the five insights that I had since turning forty. I hope some or all of them struck a chord in you.
Do you find that you endlessly set goals but never act on them? How will you break this cycle?
