‘Retreating: why life will never be the same again’
If I may take just a moment of your time
As you’ll see from my profile, I’m just some guy taking his shot at being a writer, who follows the golden rule: ‘apply seat of pants to chair and write’. I’ve been doing so for two months now. If you like what you read, do feel free to caffeinate me at https://buymeacoffee.com/kubrickandklopp
And now, for the main event, without further ‘to-do’…
Retreating: why my life will never be the same again
‘What the hell do you know about NLP?’ I found myself asking. Neuro linguistic programming. My only exposure being a book on NLP and a few Morning Miracles sessions with a coach I had known for nearly thirty years. The question was directed to my own reflection in the mirror. It was Sunday 12th May 2024, and I had no idea then that the next seven days would answer that question and so much more. This was to be my first experience of NLP, and — having politely declined the invitation four times before — words don’t truly do justice to how life-changing and transformative my week in Santa Eulalia at Tristan Soames’ retreat would be at the fifth time of asking.
I came with minimal baggage: a small carry-on suitcase and even smaller shoulder bag, an open mind and empty notebook, and a bunch of questions. I had no idea how much other baggage however I was carrying within me, and how many limiting beliefs and stories that no longer served me were also on my shoulders. My brain was foggy and dark, senses dulled. I was full of torment, and unaware that my past had polluted the deepest recesses of my heart and soul. I had no idea. Literally none.
Now I came to this week-long retreat as a nearly 49 year old who thought he had already done most of the work. 19 years of therapy. Personal development from The Landmark Forum to Tony Robbins and back again. Transcendental Meditation. Twelve Step and other Fellowship programmes. Dozens of soulful and nurturing books read. You name it. I was someone with plans and daily practice. And despite an ‘annus horribilus’ for my family and I in 2023 which brought me to my knees, I thought I was in a good place.
I left with a profound appreciation of who I really was, will be and am right now, in this very moment. I left with actionable plans, motivation, clarity, insight, and lightness. I left with a new community, a family, a tribe that grew from a system into something uniquely powerful and caring. I left with absolute certainty about what I would be doing tomorrow and not a scintilla of doubt that there was nothing that could stand in my way. I left a free man. I left aware that I was already ‘home’, and had been all my life, despite looking endlessly for it. I left transformed, reeling, filled with love, devoid of fear.
I could describe who was there, the process, the venue. I could go into detail about the morning sessions on offer — from Chi Kung to Feldenkreiss, Breathwork to Yoga — and the NLP exercises and practice that unfolded. I could go into the structure, the models, the practice, and the impact. I could tell you about the food, our own personal chef catering to our every culinary need and desire. I could even paint a picture of the venue, the most glorious finca in acres of land, with swimming pool and scenic views at every step.
I could try and explain it a million ways and never get close. If you want some of those practical answers about NLP and to meet the man who made it all happen, then you can download Tristan’s book, reach him directly via www.tristansoames.com and get more answers to the questions you might have today. But what I can tell you about is the result and a small vignette about my journey over the last seven days and since. And as a writer it is my pleasure to try to hone my craft in this very article.
I arrived as an aspiring writer who was on a journey to doing so professionally and dreams of writing my first novel. I arrived without a home of my own, having sold my flat in March 2024 and since been living with family while I re-set. I arrived with no job, no current clients, and no income from work. I arrived overweight, inflexible in body — and I was to discover, mind — full of fears and trauma. I arrived, frankly, in desperate need for everything on offer, and with a desire to absorb everything that was on offer, whilst learning a new language: that of NLP.
On Day One I realised that writing my novel was well within my reach. By Day Two I was published in an international newspaper. By Day Three, writing the book that I had been wanting to write for 35 years. By Day Four I had healed from childhood trauma repressed since before my earliest memories, and held by the group, after crying rivers of tears filled with grief and joy. I had experienced a powerful Ascencion. I was offered a house to live in, in an area I had left because I couldn’t afford a flat. By Day Five I had rewritten my past and crafted a new future, and then did the same for and with someone else. By Day Six I was soaring with eagles — literally and figuratively — looking down from above the clouds, flying for the very first time. I had become an eagle. Yes, you read that right. Majestic. Powerful. Wise. I am an Eagle now. Quote me on that.
But what I really want to share is what I was left with on Day Seven. A profound sense of calm, gratitude, hope and relief. I left with lightness, levity, laughter, and love. Above all, love, and joy. For myself. For my new tribe. For the world. For it all. And I carried it home with me and leant into it again today. And it’s still evolving, forming, expanding, as I spend some time reconnecting with my family and those people I love most of all. This week was like a tsunami of love, overflowing and stripping back everything in its path: the past didn’t stand a chance. In the clearing it created, new worlds were born.
I’m not sure I’ve processed even 1% of what my psyche, soul and cognitive abilities have experienced in these last eight days. I have pages in my notebook to re-visit and pages in Tristan’s book to re-read. I have notes and photos, links and resources, seemingly limitless playlists and book recommendations, observations, and reminders. I have new people in my life — over twenty of them in total — who I now know and who know me in ways I might never reach with some of my best friends. The profundity is infinite. The gifts never-ending. The transformation all-encompassing and yet ongoing.
‘So what the hell do I know about NLP now?’ I ask myself? Enough to know that it will be a huge part of my life for my remaining years on this planet, and that I have so much more to learn. Enough to make me wish that everyone was able to attend this retreat, and benefit from the most transformative experience of my life. Enough to know that I’ll be back in Ibiza in October. Enough to know that I am and always was blessed with infinite power. Enough to acknowledge that The Universe permeates every cell of my being, and that in each of those cells is an entire Universe all of its own. Enough to know that while Tristan would probably wince if I used this word, I had found a true guru.
In the Crisinity we now face — understanding how to access opportunities within all of the societal, environmental, geo-political and human crises we face — we need leaders with integrity, passion, purpose and vision. We need Ultrapreneurs: entrepreneurs who go beyond their own interests and help others touch the sky. Tristan Soames and his amazing team are exactly that. What they delivered for us all was beyond magical. And the ripples in the pond of my life won’t ever settle, now all this magic has touched my soul, filled my lungs, and taken me home. And as I step into my limitless future, more confident with every step, all I can think to say in closing is this: thank you.
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As you’ll see from my profile, I’m just some guy taking his shot at being a writer, who follows the golden rule: ‘apply seat of pants to chair and write’. I’ve been doing so for two months now. If you like what you read, do feel free to caffeinate me at https://buymeacoffee.com/kubrickandklopp