An exercise to consider personal values
Values shape our decisions. They help us ‘be the change we want to see in the world’, if we’re paying attention and truly living them. They’re also the lens through which we interpret all sorts of data, whether we realise it or not. So it’s good to know what that lens is and how it’s shaping us.
As a life-long vegetarian, I’ve felt the impact of my values on everyday decision making for as long as I can remember. Scanning food labels, checking brand names against a mental boycott list of organisations with poor animal welfare or environmental records. Nonetheless, I was skeptical when colleague Matt McStravick introduced a values exercise to CAST in June 2019. This was shortly before Catalyst’s launch. Could a complex mosaic of personal beliefs be so easily distilled?
Yes, it turns out. And it was a helpful and interesting process. Here it is, so you can repeat it (full credit to Matt for putting this together).
Values exercise
For the sake of this exercise, we’ll use this definition of a personal value: a way of being or behaving that you hold most important.
The exercise is a classic ‘simple not easy’ one. There’s not much to it. Using this list as a guide, please choose two values that speak to you above all others.
Most people want to select between 10 and 15. It’s difficult to boil them down to two, but it’s important to do so. From a data set of 10k, the evidence suggests that the people who stick with the task long enough to complete it, recognise that they have a second tier of values, or subsidiaries, that all stem from the two at the top. They’re also the people that are most likely to be living by any of their values.
- Start by identifying a long list and whittle them down to two.
- Add subsidiaries to your main values as a way of doing that.
- Try asking yourself these questions: Does this define me? Is this a filter that I use to make hard decisions? Is this who I am at my best?
- Resist holding onto words that you’ve been coached to be, or feel you should hold dear. Stick with those that speak about your deepest held beliefs.
- Don’t worry about how relevant your values might be to our work.
My values
I couldn’t quite get it down to two, but I narrowed to three:
- Integrity
My sense of ethics, fairness, courage and responsibility are all bound up in this one. As a teenager I formed the maxim ‘if you care, and you can, then you should’, i.e. take action. That felt manageable then — slightly less so now when there’s so much to care about.
Integrity is a bit of a moving target. I continually reevaluate what ‘good’, ‘right’ or ‘true’ is and looks like, based on new perspectives or information. Then consider whether my actions and decisions are in line with that new understanding, and if not, what I can do about it. Like the quote above.
This has led to personal decisions like adopting a plant-based seasonal diet, and auditing my purchases against Ethical Consumer’s score tables. But also fun things like dying my hair and choosing an increasingly colourful second-hand wardrobe; a simple way to raise a smile from small children and remind me not to take myself too seriously :) - Exploration
This wasn’t on the words list, but feels too central to leave out. I’m at my best when approaching each day as a wide-eyed quest into the unknown. With open mind, heart and stomach — hungry for experience, connection and learning, though aspiring not to be gluttonous. Discovering through stepping back as much as charging forwards.
I associate this energy with the wise elder archetype, introduced to me by brilliant movement medicine teacher, Ben Yeger. The wise elder accepts what is and what is emerging; has no attachment to any particular outcome; is available to be present for the evolving truth of things; loves self and others just as we are, flaws and everything; and doesn’t stand in judgement or need to be right.
There’s a constant dance between this and the convictions of integrity. It’s hard not to make too-eager value judgements when you have strong principles. But it’s usually wiser to step back, observe and sit with it before interacting. I love the Quaker practice of dedicating time and space to discernment (collective, intuitive exploration to find the kernel or way forward) for this reason. - Community
For me, community means people with something in common — place, interests, purpose etc. — actively figuring out how best to be together. Ideally in harmony with other living beings and the environment.
To live or work in community with others provides companions to explore with. It speaks to something profound and stirring about what life is, or could be. Like this description in Olaf Stapledon’s epic book, Star Maker:
“The true goal of human activity was the creation of a world-wide community of awakened and intelligently creative persons, related by mutual insight and respect, and by the common task of fulfilling the potentiality of the human spirit on earth.”
Strong communities are based on reciprocity. They recognise the generative value of difference and diversity. One that has been hugely formative for me is Whirl-Y-Gig, London’s longest running world music dance night. Its strap line, ‘Music and people of all ages and places’ only hints at the uncommonly welcoming and inclusive space created each month. People come together and dance, share stories, bounce giant balloons around and generally have a great time. Old timers make newcomers feel at home and accepted. It’s been a 30-year labour of love by Mary and Richard Sutcliffe, supported by a dedicated team that includes my sound engineer uncle. It’s the truest expression of straight-up, feel-it-in-your-bones community I know. Even thinking about it makes me excited and hopeful.
The personal values we’re bringing to Catalyst
At the first meeting of our new Catalyst team and stewards, we spent a good 20 minutes talking about our personal values. It felt important to get to know where each other were coming from, not only in relation to our shared project, but as people generally. The combined list now includes:
- Kindness, Compassion, Community
- Equality, Humility, Responsibility, Integrity
- Adventure, Growth, Horizon, Exploration
Mine haven’t changed since I first did the exercise. I suspect they will be as constant as the three things that reliably ground me: food, nature and music. But who knows.
