What If We Never Find Love?
The romantic fallacy that eludes us
In the movies I’ve been watching lately, a recurring theme that plays out is: Don’t rush into marriage until you’ve discovered love.
It sounds like sensible advice, but it feels odd to me.
As I’ve navigated through these recent years, I’ve come across a profound truth: a life filled with richness and fulfilment isn’t solely dependent on romantic love. It’s possible to experience perfect contentment and happiness in a relationship, even in the absence of passionate love.
During my teenage years, I realized that my parents, like many others, weren’t romantically in love. What defined their relationship was mutual respect and genuine affection, but the spark of romantic love never seemed to have ignited for them.
As I observed other relationships around me, I noticed a familiar pattern — a passionate honeymoon period followed by an unspoken acceptance that those intense feelings might not last.
Life’s challenges, the responsibilities of raising children, and societal pressures took precedence.
People seemed to accept that romantic love would naturally fade over time.
But could these couples still be happy after all these years? Seems like that.
Today, I see couples who have been together for over 25 years. They still don’t appear to be in love, yet seem content and at peace.
Their love, I’ve come to understand, has a unique meaning.
It’s not about grand gestures or passionate embraces. Instead, it’s rooted in acceptance and reality.
Are they entirely happy? I can’t say for sure, but they’ve discovered a sense of acceptance and peace which many may find hard to understand.
This revelation has also led me to re-evaluate the conventional tale of love and happiness.
Perhaps I, too, might find joy and fulfilment in a relationship, even if it doesn’t align with the traditional norms of love.
