Let’s talk honestly…
How committed are we to our recovery?
“I’m not even curious” — that’s what my Israeli friend said to me when we talked about life after Coronavirus.
I was marvelling, as many of us are, at the surreal nature of life in limbo; the lessons we are learning about surrender, acceptance, community, resilience, connection, freedom, humour… how we are being forced to sit in and work through emotions like anxiety, uncertainty, instability…. the muscles we are strengthening around peace with stillness, satisfaction with simplicity… how blind and destructive we become when we’re caught up in striving, accruing, moving, getting, attaining…
The lessons are coming thick and fast… and we’re blessed with the opportunity to practice becoming masters of a living a more peaceful, integrated, conscious, harmonious life and fostering a more compassionate and grateful inner state of being…
The wellness industry, self-development gurus and spiritual teachers are using the opportunity to turn up the volume around consciousness and they’re spouting all this wonderful content about this global opportunity to return to our heart space…
Incredibly uplifting and inspiring video content is emerging showing the innovative ways people are finding to connect, lift their spirits, support their neighbour and finding the funny in the fucked…
In fact, I wrote about this topic…
But, my next thought is, I wonder… will these lessons simply remain as fodder for memes?
I asked my friend about what he thinks will happen once the restrictions are lifted and we are free to ‘begin’ again.
Will we simply resume living life in the same way we always have? Will we let time work it’s magic in the way that it does when we decide to quit smoking, detox from alcohol, commit to getting fit and working out a few times a week; we forget. We forget what inspired us and compelled us to make positive changes. We start off completely inspired and full of gusto as we imagine our new and improved lives without the things that harmed us or with the new things that serve us… and then… after a few weeks… we’re back in bed with our ex.
Will we forget the enormous lessons we learned as we strengthened and grew through adversity, when times are rosy again and we can let our guard down?
Will we look back and laugh at how crazy life was when we had to go slower, move around less, find interesting ways of entertaining ourselves, use our time to reach out and check in on others, be innovative in the ways we use our skills to support and help others overwhelmed by fear and foreboding… wash our hands…
My friend, typically Israeli with his understandably cynical mentality, believes with fierce conviction that nothing will change after Coronavirus. He believes that we will fall straight back into life at the mercy of capitalism, consumerism, industrialism… chasing status, striving for personal gain and ignoring the enormous lesson we’ve been shown about the power of unity and connection and supporting your neighbour…
This pessimistic point of view kept puncturing my wonderful “yay the world is waking up” bubble.
Israelis, no doubt, have seen their fair share of shitty times.
They’ve lived their version of Coronavirus through multiple wars and intifadas… where the streets became unsafe due to terrorism and extremist ideology and notions of God given rights, not an invisible virus. They’ve seen awakenings and ceasefire deals which seemed promising only to have life return to the violent status quo once again.
I get that its my Israeli friends who raise some legitimate concern around our capacity to put our newfound realisations into practice; to really take heed and make changes. It makes sense that they have a cynical view of humanity.
But I’m Australian… and so, obviously, I’m more like… yeah, nah. I’m resistant to embracing the doom and gloom approach to the future. Not from a naive, idealistic, denying reality kind of place. Instead, I believe we really need to look at ourselves and acknowledge our tendencies and then treat ourselves as though we are in a recovery program.
First we need to admit — we are addicts.
We are addicted to so many things that I needn’t lay out specifically; ways of life, beliefs and behaviours that aren’t sustainable for our lives as individuals, communities or to ensure the continuation of our species on the blue planet — and I’m not being dramatic here…
Like most recovering addicts, we tend to go into rehab and make changes when our back is up against it… but when the coast is clear… we often don’t remember why we made those changes in the first place and we give in to old, unsustainable comforts. That’s why we need buddies… support systems to keep us in check.
I mean one of our tendencies as an addicted species was highlighted while I was out in the Arava Desert (before we were all ordered into self-isolation)… far away from the world of modern day, western ideals.
We were listening to a lecture about climate change. I know. Everyone’s favourite topic.
It seemed a funny time for all of us to be talking about climate change during the Coronavirus outbreak.
It made me think of a meme that I’d seen floating around (the Coronavirus memes are really one of the best things to come out of this crisis — let’s be honest) highlighting our reaction to Coronavirus versus climate change.
OF COURSE the Coronavirus has a better publicist than Climate Change because Coronavirus is RIGHT NOW… and in our face… and as I said, we always wait until our backs are up against a wall to make a change. We only meditate ONCE we’re stressed and we only eat healthily once we get sick. We don’t think to MEDITATE so that we can handle stress when it comes and we don’t eat healthily to stave off sickness. We tend not to be creatures of prevention.
A question from someone in the climate change lecture audience really highlighted what she saw at play here. She asked about finding the balance between urgency and importance.
Climate Change might be important — but when there appears to be things that are far more urgent to us like making money to be able to take my girlfriend for a fancy steak dinner… and buying a ticket to Burning Man so I can connect with people and be free to express myself… and exploring the world because #yolo… and the things I want to do and have in my life now because I’m here now… and buying food and products that are cheap cos I can’t afford sustainably grown produce and getting takeout in a plastic container cos I don’t have time to cook the kids food and staying inside because Coronavirus… then, climate change becomes well… I mean, it’s important… but it will have to wait.
The lecturer responded with this —
People are dying as a result of poor air pollution every day.
But here’s what we need to acknowledge about humans…
We aren’t looking to eradicate air pollution, because that would mean putting a pause on capitalism and consumerism (as examples).
The reason it’s easier to rally the troops in the hopes of flattening the curve in Coronavirus deaths… is because we believe that once the virus is contained, we can go back to the way we were.
That’s why, the lecturer argues, it seems more important for us to attend to Coronavirus than Climate Change.
Coronavirus seems like it isn’t calling for a permanent change in lifestyle.
Hmm. Good point.
Many of us are talking about what we’re learning here… but how committed are we to following through and putting the realisations in place?
While we think we want to change… in actuality… if we’re honest… do we want to?
While many of us are talking about wanting to change… when push comes to shove… will we?
I propose this.
If we can admit that we don’t want to or WON’T ACTUALLY follow through on the talk… then… maybe we actually stand a better chance of recovering.
Why?
Because then we can accept that we are addicts.
We are addicted to the lifestyle afforded to us by modern day capitalism and consumerism and a ‘me first’ mentality…
Then, once we’re honest with ourselves, we can treat ourselves like patients in recovery after we’ve come out of this period of self-isolation therapy.
I’m still pondering this and processing how to make good of the hard work we’re all putting in to slowing down and accepting and embracing and all the things….
When we get out of here, how can we hold ourselves accountable to upholding the values that we’ve come to see better serve us, once we’re given our freedom to choose again?
How can we retain our wisdom?
Do we need a buddy system?
Do we need to use this time to form groups, whether online or live, where we can hold the space for each other to step into these new ways of life that promote moments of stillness, reflection, less striving, hoarding, attachment, more surrender, more support, more presence?
What services are REALLY necessary to us in order to live a meaningful and fulfilling life?
Will we have learned anything about our power as individuals and as a group? About tribalism and globalisation? About sharing and collaboration?
How can we put these realisations into practice?
What’s going to prevent a relapse?
How can we transform these awakenings from ideas and intentions into a lived experience… apply it to our reality?
On an entirely practical level …
CAN we live differently WITHIN a capitalistic society?
Could we actually buy less, work less and value health and presence more… ? What will that mean for us as a planet if we do?
How do we put a economy that’s gone sideways through rehab… are we doomed to use the same dangerous substances we used before?
How will we retain all the good that’s emerged from this global re-education…?
Ok. I’ll go first.
I’m Tracy Alexander and I’m addicted to instant gratification, constant intellectual stimulation, the need to move around and see all the things and experience all the things, external validation and praise, feeling ‘productive’ and like I’m ‘using my time’ when actually sitting still is actually an amazing use of my time, accomplishing things that don’t fucking matter… and sugar… I’m definitely addicted to sugar… and caffeine… but I mean… come on, you’ve also gotta live… right? I’m keeping sugar. I’m keeping caffeine for now… I digress.
These addictions are creating behaviours which don’t serve me and ultimately others.
They say energy flows where attention goes.
SO if I want to foster inner harmony, peace, a sustained sense of abundance, joy, freedom, flexibility, wonder… well then that’s where I need to put my attention now.
If I want the gifts of Coronavirus — that’s where I’ll put my attention. I’ll spend this time focusing on what I WANT to cultivate, what I WANT to include in my life, what I WANT to exist in my reality… and I need to find ways to catch myself and readjust when I fall back into my crutches and addictions… to redirect my attention.
I’m scared that I’ll fail… I probably will fail a lot… but this is the first step, no? Being honest with ourselves?
From an honest place, I’m more likely to make a change and stick to it…
From an honest place I can’t fool myself into thinking my life will get better without putting in the actual work. I can’t pretend that it’ll be the next person’s problem…. because it turns out the next person’s problem has already become my problem…
Go figure.
See you when we get out of here, guys! Here’s hoping we can stay clean.
