How To Get Through A Time Where Mass Shootings Are The Norm

At this point I am in between feeling numb and walking out my front door screaming. I am in between being dedicated to bringing children into this world that will be groomed to advocate for peace and equity and at the same time not wanting to bring a life into a world like this at all. Every day it is something. I am overwhelmed by the constant mass shooting stories, yet underwhelmed by the lack of reporting for Black death in Chicago and missing Black women in the DMV. It is hard to preserve yourself in times like these, but it is definitely 100% necessary, especially for social worker’s, educators, health professionals, organizers, policy makers etc. whose daily work is to ameliorate inequities. Our work and our passions force us to live in this space of consumption, but how do we not let it consume us?

The nonprofit paradox, which simply put is the idea that those that serve others forget to serve themselves and thereafter create toxic environments at work and at home. I see it all over the place, and not just at nonprofits but in environments/professions described above.

Self-care has become such a buzzword, but in my most non preachy voice you cannot forget to practice it. We need those fighting to replenish themselves so that they can continue to fight. Here are some ways I suggest especially Black and Brown social servers take care of themselves in these times.

1. Turn it Off

Yes being informed allows us to mobilize and understand the appropriate steps needed to take action and partake in discourse in matters that are important to us. But we need to be aware of how much we consume and how it impacts us. I myself have vowed to not watch any videos of any kind of shooting. I have a friend who refuses to watch the When They See Us docuseries and know many people who have banned news outlets in their homes. Whether it is your timeline, someone else’s timeline, news, or avoiding a person that may constantly bring up the negativity in the world. TURN IT OFF.

2. Meditate

I am sure by now you have heard about the benefits of meditation, specifically its calming properties. Here I want to highlight an app I find helpful. Liberate is a great app to assist you in starting your meditation journey and want a guided practice with POC practitioners. It is categorized by different meditation styles and let me tell you it is WOKE and keeps things like access, stigma and spirituality in mind.

3. Exercise

Get your 30 minutes in. Anything to get your heart rate pumping. This could be running, biking, dancing around your room, a game of HORSE, jumping jacks. JUST MOVE.

4. Talk About It

Call a trusted friend and vent. Talk to your therapist, your mom, dad. Anyone you trust and feel comfortable with that can listen while you verbally articulate your thoughts with them. It helps you process and get to the core of how you feel and how what is going on around you is impacting you.

5. Get Your Hair Done

I for one just always feel like getting my hair done instantly puts me in a good mood. You can’t tell me nothing after a fresh retwist. And fellas, I know a fresh hair cut does that to y’all too.

6. Spend Time in Nature

Research shows that spending time in nature improves your mood and overall health. If you live in nature, get on your porch and enjoy your backyard. If not, find a park, pond, hill where you can get away to for a bit. In today’s fast paced urban jungles it can be difficult to get away so in this same bullet point I would suggest bringing nature to where you are as well. Get some plants in your home, snake plant, philodendron, lavender, peace lily and aloe vera in particular are extremely calming.

7. Cry

I once heard that crying is like peeing. Once it builds up to a certain point, you must release. Let it all out. It’s not for everyone, but I feel like after a good cry I am able to get right back to it feeling a little less weighted down.

8. Hold Someone Tight

Who doesn’t love a good hug from someone you love?! And again the research shows the importance of touch and connection. So hold onto someone, look into their eyes and increase connection in a world where we feel so disconnected.

Find what works for you and commit to incorporating more of that in your life. Please. We need you. The world needs you.