The First Brunch V. The Last Supper
I want you to close your eyes and envision Jesus Christ right now. Who do you see? Most individuals would picture a tall white male with blue eyes and killer abs dressed in a white robe. Right? Have you wondered why Jesus looked so perfectly toned and handsome? Christianity has hyper masculinity and patriarchy written all over it! Religion has painted a picture of what a perfect man should look like and act like. He must be powerful and strong (and have killer abs) that’s a “real man.” Now let’s add his disciples. When you picture his disciples who do you see? Twelve masculine men right? Why is that? Were there no women back then?
Have you ever seen this painting? Of course you have! It’s Leonardo da Vinci The Last Supper. It’s one of the most recognized most famous paintings ever. (And if you don’t recognize it then maybe you’ve been living under a rock.) I always looked at this painting and wondered why there were only men sitting at the table? I questioned why Jesus was male and not female. I grew up Christian so questioning the Bible or God was unheard of. I was to recognize that Jesus was a MAN of power and I was to do as HE says. (WTF?) Patriarchy at its finest!! (I love you Jesus but…) We’ve been socialized to connect God to male but what if God was a SHE! What if his disciples were females?! What would it have looked like? Would our whole perceptive of religion and patriarchy be different?
The First Brunch is my version of The Last Supper. My hyper feminine version. What is happening in this picture you may ask? Well, this is the scene where Jesus is telling his disciples that someone at the table is going betray him. (dramatic music) His disciples are trying to figure out who is it. In my version we have a group of women gossiping about who cheated on Jesus. First, we have Bartholomew and James Minor whispering in Andrew’s ear. Andrew is probably saying “I don’t want any part of this.” Next to Andrew we have Peter. In Da Vinci’s version Peter is holding a knife. In my version she’s holding a heel representing “cat fights.” Peter is probably saying “once I found out who it is, ill cut him with my heel!” Then, we have Judas. Judas the snitch. That one girlfriend you can’t tell any secrets to because you know she’s going to snitch on you. In Da Vinci’s painting Judas is holding the bag of money he got for snitching on Jesus. In my version she is holding a purse while talking on her phone saying “Gurl, I know who cheated on Jesus.” Next, we have John. Many believe that John wasn’t really John but Marry disguised as John. The story goes that women weren’t allowed to sit at the same table as Jesus. (Patriarchy at its finest) So in my version I had a male disguised as a woman. Then of course we Jesus front and center glowing and beautiful. On the right side of Jesus we have James Major trying to stop the drama that Thomas and Philip are saying. Thomas is saying “Oh I know who it is. I never liked that guy.” And finally we have Matthew, Thaddeus, and Simon gossiping trying to figure out who would cheat on Jesus. As the story goes, in The Last Supper Jesus breaks bread and wine with his disciples. In my version “women don’t eat carbs, oh no” women eat salads and fruit. They also drink pink dirty martins and are always dolled up.
All jokes aside simply changing the gender of this painting is not going to change this patriarchy world that we live in. Switching gender roles is not the solution to equality. Just because men see women as a sexual object doesn’t mean women should see men as sexual objects. The male gaze does exist but how do we break that? By creating a female gaze? By objectifying men? By oppressing men? By making men feel less than and insecure? No! That’s not the solution because that’s just bringing us down to the same level as the oppressor. Are we fighting for power and control? Are we fighting to be equal to the man? No! Then what do we do as feminist? These are the questions that circle my mind when trying to grow as a feminist. I don’t hate men I love men. We are all human beings and we should all be able to sit at the table and have brunch with Jesus (male or female).
