That drooling smile and toothless grin
And then you both are up all night
A screaming child who just won’t sleep
Exhausted, drained you lose the fight
A person standing at the stove
Salting and stirring out the bland
A perfect act of love expressed
A blessing of the heart and hand
A cold fear grips your body whole
A tragedy unfurls its leaves
Becomes a full-blown horror show
As you stand still in disbelief
The thrills and skippy feels you get
When something goes just right this time
It’s time for party vibes and joy
When things look sparkly (even grime)
The terror of a future felt
In shock and horror we witness
What we have done to kill our home
Our livelihood, our own fitness
We do not get a ‘get-out’ clause
Though heady heights our thoughts can reach
We are so human, frail and real
The Sages would do well to teach
That knowing in your head won’t help
When blood and guts are spilling there
We need to get down on our knees
And see the Sacred everywhere
• Elizabeth Lovius, London July 2019
This poem was inspired by reading a blog from the wise Jeff Foster… It felt like a helpful place to stand spiritually when our hearts are raw and our bellies quaking at the idea of human self-destruction.
“I am Pure Awareness. The Unmoving Subject of experience. That which never changes. I am Consciousness itself.
It may be true, on an absolute level. But try saying that to your partner, when he or she stands in front of you, demanding your human heart, your truth, your vulnerability, your brokenness and your courage, your fire, your sorrow, your fear, your rawness and your awkward authenticity. I have seen too many spiritual teachers attempting to avoid deep human connection and intimacy using spiritual concepts.
Yes — on some unspeakable and mysterious level we are all the same God-Awareness.
But — we are also gorgeously messy human beings, imperfect, unfinished, traumatised to the extent that we are traumatised. Realizing that we are Awareness does not change this fact. In fact, realization only makes us more acutely aware of the subtleties of our humanness than ever. More willing to be raw, vulnerable, naked.
Personally, I am deeply in love with this yummy mess of humanity. I am in profound relationship — yes, relationship — with shaky hearts, fluttery bellies, yearning and confusion and anxiety too. I see none of it as separate from God none of it as some “sign” that we are failing, or not yet “fully realised”. I see all of it as deeply sacred; I believe it is deep in this ordinary sacredness that we find our true freedom.”
— Jeff Foster