Finding Bliss in Solitude
What I do to enjoy spending time alone
Solitude is the state of being alone.
As I sit here writing this with my cup of tea in front of me and the sound of soft jazz playing in the background, I can’t help but feel at peace. Ah… so this is what bliss feels like.
Solitude can often be given a bad reputation. When people think of being alone, it’s often associated with feeling lonely; but it doesn’t have to be this way. Solitude is learning to be content with silence. There is healing in loneliness and peace in silence if you just take the time to look. But society is afraid of being alone. And with the rise of technology and social media platforms, it’s no wonder that we are. We’re constantly being overloaded with information about things that I’m sure we would’ve been much better off not knowing. We never seem to have time for ourselves, and when we do, we fill it up with friends, games, movies, etc. Anything to distract us from our thoughts and emotions.
How often do you take the time to let your mind wander?
Happiness to me lies in the scent of hot tea, the softness of my bed, the sound of my breath, and the silence that accompanies me when I’m alone. I became friends with solitude when I realized the amount of healing that can be done within it. The monsters that hid deep within my heart and came out in moments alone no longer phased me. Instead, I quietly acknowledged them and proceeded on with my day.
Being alone doesn’t have to be scary; it can instead be blissful if you make it.
Here are some “being alone” activities that light up my heart.
1: Journaling
Journaling is an activity that allows you to reflect and reconnect with yourself. My journal is one of my greatest companions and oldest friend. It has accompanied me for the past couple of years and has seen sides of me that no one else has. Sides that even I myself had forgotten.
I’ll be honest, there are days, weeks, and even months that I’ve gone without journaling. And during those times, I always notice a decrease in my mental state. There are so many benefits to journaling, but the one that I love is how journaling allows you to discover your emotions. We all have moments where we have trouble identifying what we’re feeling. Journaling is one of the best solutions to this. There’s just something so calming and reassuring about finally putting a name to an emotion.
“Ah, so this is what I feel,” you can’t help but think.
I hope that reading this will encourage you to take up journaling. But if journaling is not for you, then that’s okay.
2: Let Your Mind Wander
Some people find comfort in silence, and others have a hard time with it. If being alone with your thoughts seems scary or even boring, be patient with it. Perhaps after a while, you’ll begin to see it in a new light.
We, as a society, spend so much time working or rushing that we forget to leave time for ourselves. And the times that we aren’t working, we spend recovering from work. The funny thing is that we think that occupying our time with Netflix and celebrity news counts as self-care when in reality, it doesn’t. It’s just another thing that we do in order to distract ourselves. We don’t give ourselves enough time to just be; to just listen to the sound of our breaths or the chirping of the birds, to admire the way our bodies work instead of criticizing it, to notice the features that make us unique, and to appreciate the fact that despite everything that we’ve been through, we’re still here.
As a challenge, I dare you to spend at least 5 minutes a day with your thoughts and surroundings. Write down what you feel and what you notice and keep it in a log to reread after a week has passed. Who knows, some of the things that you notice might surprise you.
3: Take Yourself On A Date
Go to the movies or out dancing. Pick a restaurant that you’ve never tried before, or stick to your go-to. Perhaps you’d rather be inside in that case, cook yourself dinner or lunch and put on your favorite playlist while doing it. Get dressed up. Put on makeup if you want, and try on that dress or tux that you’ve been saving for special occasions or perhaps felt too insecure to wear. Visualize your perfect date no matter how simple it may seem, and then recreate it for a party of one.
To me, a perfect date is a day spent without others. I love the idea of being alone with my partner and doing activities that don’t require us to be around other people. Cooking at home, playing board games, working on a puzzle, or watching a movie while enjoying a glass of wine all sound perfect to me, so I recreate this with myself. It’s been one of my favorite activities so far, and it allows me to make more time for myself. So ask yourself what a perfect date looks like to you, and then think of ways to recreate it. If you’re having trouble with this, think about your love language.
These activities make me appreciate being alone. It reminds me of life’s best things when I’m feeling disconnected and teaches me to recognize the beauty that is myself. I am imperfect, ever-changing, and growing, and that’s what makes me…me. Perfectly imperfect and learning to be okay with myself and my thoughts.
I hope that you find these activities helpful, and I encourage you to give them a try.
Thank you for reading. ~
