Book Review: The Four Agreements

The Four Agreements is a book written by Don Miguel Ruiz who is a Mexican author, his work is inspired by Toltec spiritualism and Neo-shamanistic texts. The Four agreements are a summary of mastery of transformation, one of the masteries of Toltec. It was first published in 1997, and the book gained popularity when Oprah Winfrey endorsed it in 2001.

Summary

In the book, Don Miguel explains how the outside world has a major impact on how we live our lives. And he calls this Domestication. It certainly does not mean anything positive. Domestication pushes us to be fearful and judgemental. People are only rewarded if they obey the outside world, and when they follow their actions, they are addicted to the rewards. If they do not obey them, then they are punished to feel that they are not good enough. Based on this, Don Miguel says that people are not afraid of death. Instead they are afraid of being who they truly are. So, to be genuinely happy, we need to break away from all the shackles.

We have been oppressed since we were young. We are born into social norms that dictate our dreams we can have in our life. The author emphasizes on the fact that the collective dream of the world influences the individual dreams. And this collective dream is taught by our teachers, parents, politicians, and religions. We are educated on how to behave ‘properly,’ what should we believe, and the difference between right and wrong. This acceptance of social norms is know as domestication. If we try to rebel against it, we are punished and suppressed by the powerful schools and parents. So, initially we all surrender to them, but as we grow we no longer need to obey them. We can break the social agreements to establish the new agreements within ourselves. Don Miguel suggested four agreements one needs to make with one self, here are the four agreements:

The Four Agreements

1. Be impeccable with your word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
2. Don’t take anything personally: Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
3. Don’t make assumptions: Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
4. Always do your best: Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any situation, just do your best, in this way you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.

Opinion

Personally, I really liked the book. We all live in a dream made up of concepts, labels, and beliefs. The author has laid down the principles which we can use to re-engineer our life and become more aware of our dream. In a nut-shell, become aware of the agreements that dictate your reality and have the discipline to change them.This book is full of wisdom, even though the ideas we come across are not revolutionary. If you are young, and struggling to find your dream, then this book is for you. I’d suggest every person in their 20s to read this book.

Rating: 5/5

“Do not be concerned about the future; keep your attention on today, and stay in the present moment.”

Footnotes

Toltec, is a path that teaches us to transcend our limiting beliefs and self-sabotaging behavior patterns so we may live a fulfilling and authentic life.