A Year Later, The Body Remembers
Managing COVID-19 Trauma Anniversary Reactions
I spent the first few days of March 2020 in Manhattan at a grant meeting. I came across photos from that trip last night and was jolted by seeing packed streets and full faces — so many noses and mouths.
My throat started to close up. My chest felt tight. My thoughts raced and I began, inexplicably, to tear up. I met those sensations with curiosity and realized: my body had marked the anniversary and was making sure I knew.
Trauma anniversary reactions are annual reminders of trauma or sudden loss that occurred. If the traumatic experience is ongoing, like with COVID-19, the anniversary often marks the point at which the experience began. These reactions are largely unconscious. In many cases, you may not put two and two together until you see a calendar. But they are very real and can be very distressing.
The ‘why’ behind trauma anniversary reactions is tricky, as it relates to the complex way traumatic memories are stored in the brain. The brain is organized hierarchically: the bottom parts (for our purposes, the brainstem, and midbrain) develop first and are responsible for more basic functions like breathing and blood flow, while the top parts develop later and are responsible for more sophisticated functions like planning and problem-solving.